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'I want a blue light too...'
01/12/2008 08:40  - (SA)  

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Chris Moerdyk

My new year's resolution for 2009 is that I am not going to drive anywhere unless I can have my own blue light convoy.

Just like all those cabinet ministers, deputy ministers, party leaders, provincial MECs and just about anybody who can claim to have some sort of public office or frankly knows where to find the application form for their very own, personal, blue light convoy.

Of course, politicians claim that they need to get to meetings fast and safely without hassling in the traffic the way we mere mortals do. Because what they're doing is important for the country.

Well, there are a heck of a lot of other people that are doing important things for the country that have to twiddle their thumbs in traffic jams. People like Raymond Ackerman for example. I reckon he does a lot more good for this country than the majority of cabinet ministers. Last time I looked he didn't have a blue light convoy.

Then there are the chairs and CEOs of all our big companies who have meetings that could decide whether we actually eat or not. Or have jobs to go to. Don't they deserve blue light convoys too? Their safety is also critically important. And teachers and nurses and doctors.

In fact, the people who desperately need blue light convoys are those workers who get stranded every time Metrorail has to stop running its trains because someone the Minister of Safety and Security was supposed to have put in jail, sneaks in at night swipes all the copper wire above the railway line.

And those taxi drivers who have to struggle through the traffic to deliver to work those millions of workers who don't live anywhere near a train station. When those workers don't pitch up for work, everything comes to a grinding halt. Food doesn't get produced, cars don't get built, our telephones go on the blink, clothes don't get manufactured and so on. Let's face it, with these people not being able to get to work, this country would crash in a heartbeat. Their safety is also critically important.

Who needs it most?

I reckon the crime rate in this country is proof positive that government ministers believe it is only their safety that is important. The rest of us don't need to be safe. We have to go to the gym accompanied only by a towel and a jock-strap while ministers go in blue light convoys accompanied by a dozen or so bodyguards.

Meanwhile, if a politician doesn't come to work for a week or doesn't get to a meeting on time, what happens? Nothing really. No grinding halts to speak of. Clothes still get made, food gets produced and life goes on.

So, here's a terrifying thought. If those blue light convoys have got something to do with ensuring that the country keeps running smoothly then every combi taxi should have its own blue light convoy surely?

Ok, so that's ridiculous even though it is logical. But, I'm serious about the business sector. There are some captains of industry that are far more important to the economy and sustainability of this country than most of those ministers and MECs.

Now, all of this logical deduction of mine will, I hope, proves one thing. And that is that apart from our head of state, no-one should have any sort of convoy. And secondly, if we do have to keep these infernal blue light convoys, they should be about safety and security only, not getting to meetings on time.

If ministers want to get to meetings on time then like the rest if us they should damn well get up earlier in the morning.

A few months ago, I was waiting to cross a street when a blue light convoy came hurtling towards me. Even though I was standing on the pavement, the lead car blasted its siren at me. The driver of that car looked at me with a scowl of such arrogant proportions it was frightening.

It was a look of power; it was a look of unassailable control; it was a look of smug self-satisfaction that left me feeling as though I was nothing more than a two month old dassie turd lying the gutter.

It made me feel, very, very strongly, that the only political party I want to vote for next year is the one that promises to outlaw blue light convoys.

Send your comments to Chris.

Disclaimer: News24 encourages freedom of speech and the expression of diverse views. The views of columnists published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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  imagine
01/12/2008 08:55
Wouldn't it be great if we gave every politician his/her own blue light convoy and a circuitous route on which they be driven around and around for infinity. There could be regular stops for meetings - then back in the convoy and whoo-whoo-whooo around the cicuit again. People may even come and watch, as convoys battle it out to decide who's light is the bluest. If we can keep the politicos in their convoys, we may actually get on with our lives much better, I suspect. - lizard
 
  Culture of entitlement
01/12/2008 09:06
Here I am,sounding like a sad & disillusioned whitey (my God,it's happened! I've gone BAD!).We've had a most amazing post-election (1994)period.Full of hope and promise.But somewhere along the way,a culture of entitlement has wrested the controls from the culture of upliftment&equality.The utter bilge spewed in the name of "VIP" protection beggars belief.Dear MECs&MPs,have a nice life.Really!Have a nice life.I'm off to pay high tax & be safer.TTFN! - Cynicus
 
  hopefully
01/12/2008 09:07
Hopefully the new party COPE will outlaw blue lights convoy,if they get that on their manifesto....and hopefully they will also jealously guard our borders.....good luck Crhis...in your quest... - siphos
 
  Political Arrogance
01/12/2008 09:10
I fail to see why, as mere civil servants, politicans have a need for bodyguards and "blue-light convoys". These clowns have been elected by the people to serve the people - so what makes them so-called "VIPs"? They are no more important than anyone else. If they are so frightened that their policies will get them killed, then maybe they shouldn't be in politics as their policies are unpopular. It's time the people put their politicians in their rightful place - as civil SERVANTS! - Ashanzi
 
  Serve the public better....
01/12/2008 09:11
by realising that a government position does not mean that you need special privileges. I am with you on this one, Chris - say "No!" to blue light convoys. Only get out of the way of Metro emergency vehicles, ambulances, police vehicles and traffic patrol cars if they have their sirens on and lights flashing. - Dave Robbins
 
  Amen
01/12/2008 09:16
Except that taxis don't need blue lights, they are driving as if they have a convoy already. Often they drive in a convoy in the emergency lane anyway. - Paul
 
  What about me
01/12/2008 09:22
Yes I agree that the blue light convoys have at time act incorrectly and that there actions need to be condemned, but in the same sense we need to look in the mirror and ask ourselves do I have the right to judge there actions when we ourselves are guilty of the same offences at times and illegally so - I have seen people on my way to work this morning on countless occasions not stopping at red robots, changing lanes without indicating or ensuring that it is safe to do so and worst of all exceeding the speed limit (120 ? 200 in an 80km zone) - to me this needs the same level of condemnation. South African road users in general are arrogant and irresponsible and have no respect for there own lives and the lives of others. - colin
 
  @Chris
01/12/2008 09:25
I think that these MEC's and MP's have all been watching too many movies from hollywood, where you see the senior government officials being raced along from 1 place to another in large convoys of black SUV's at high speeds. Problem is their roads can probably accomodate this whereas ours cant. Be nice to read in the paper that the minister of roads and/or public works' convoy gets "derailed" because of a large pothole on the M1 somewhere between JHB and Pta. - Ivan
 
  Stuck in the 1950's
01/12/2008 09:25
We are still stuck in the previous era in Africa. Ever heard of the term "conference call"? Surely one does not have to see someones face to hear what he/she has to say? In first world countries you very seldom see topp brass rushing like mad hatters from point a-b. They simply apply video/telephone conferece technology. - TB
 
  Gravy Train
01/12/2008 09:29
As all they care about is their respective chairs on the gravy train, can't we put them all on the Gautrain and drive them back and forward from Pretoria to OR Tambo? After the next election you just hook on another coach. Will it still be called the Shilowa express? - Jim
 
  how true
01/12/2008 09:32
Never a truer word spoken,i guess the saddest part in this entire thing is that we "mere mortals" can only talk and vent and nothing will ever get done about,thats reality and we have to get used to it! Good article - NTBARIE
 
  Yes please!
01/12/2008 09:34
"It was a look of power; it was a look of unassailable control; it was a look of smug self-satisfaction" - pure arrogance, and that from pip-squeek bodyguards! - this is exactly what annoys me with the current batch of politicians. They believe they are above all laws and socially acceptable behaviour. How about we squash them like cockroaches? - EmTee
 
  dont worry for now
01/12/2008 09:37
Dont be too worried just now Chris. The day you see a browning or something of the like mounted on the back of a black SUV with blue light flashing and it is Malema at helm (of the browning of course) leading some or other campaign and it is he who stares at you thus, it is only then that you realise you are pretty well done as will we all be. - jimcpt
 
  Only Country?
01/12/2008 09:39
Is South Africa the only country subjected to the torment of the Blue Lights? How do politicians of other countries get around, or are they in office doing their jobs? - Rodders
 
  HaHaHaHa Chris
01/12/2008 09:46
great way to start a Monday :) - Filemon
 
  Get your life in order
01/12/2008 09:46
If these politicians will get their lives in order with some proper planning (getting out of bed 30 minutes earlier) they would not have to rush to get where they are going. Someone should show them how a diary is supposed to work. - Ben
 
  they are SERVANTS
01/12/2008 09:55
all politicians, president included, need to understand that they are public servants - we are the public, they are our servants. they would all do well to remember that ... - Kevin
 
  Status ... power... banana republic
01/12/2008 10:02
Well said Chris I can only nod and agree. Our civil servants that are sooo full of self importance they remind me of old uncle "Bob". They are all so worried about their safety yet no one has ever attempted to assassinate a civil servant (MP). I think someone needs to remind our people in office that they are civil servants responsible to the people and that they should not be civil disturbants ... - Bandit
 
  blue lights
01/12/2008 10:10
Upgrade strategically chosen designated roads with flashing blue light masts on the side for anyone in a hurry. Scrap all traffic rules for those roads and...shooting other vehicles is allowed....no police or ambulance services. Daily video shots from helicopters on TV Reality shows. - Benzo
 
  @colin
01/12/2008 10:18
Yes, these types of offenses by us 'mere mortals' are subject to the same judgment, BUT, these blue light brigades expect to be exempt from the same law as us, by way of a blue light. - chillepeppa
 
  Blue Light Brightsparks
01/12/2008 10:21
I agree with you 200% - why don't they get up on time...If we can all arrive at work on time with the ton of traffic and mahem in the mornings...then surely they could do the same! Most times I see a blue light brigade is way after rush hour anyway! So there is little traffic to contend with! They are public servants but they don't think of it that way- they are in govt and think we should serve them like royalty! The Kings & Queens in govt need to be brought down a notch or 10! - Kenroid
 
  @kevin
01/12/2008 10:22
Hear hear @ 'they are SERVANTS' I agree 100%!! Someone needs to tell THEM though. - chillepeppa
 
  On a lighter side
01/12/2008 10:24
I agree with your sentiments and thoughts. But on a lighter side taxis don't have any lights anyway, so how would a blue one make any difference. - SimonT
 
  Convoys
01/12/2008 10:25
Here in Cape Town we have daily convoys in peak hour traffic, which demand the same treatment for transporting PRISONERS! - Wayne
 
  Blame the Americans..
01/12/2008 10:50
While I detest the blue light convoys, look at Bush & co. in America. Not only do they have their blue light convoys but they even weld the damn man hole covers shut just in case. Our bunch of egotistical morons have obviously taken tips from the looneys across the Antlantic. - KD
 
  public non-servants
01/12/2008 10:50
I read the other day that Jacob Zuma had been escorted by a total of 33 cars at high speed. He is neither an elected official nor a public servant. All the more reason for his entourage to respect the law and the rights of other drivers. - neil
 
  What I would like to know...
01/12/2008 10:51
is why does JZ get a blue-light convoy if he's not even an MP or MEC? While Helen Zille is reported to drive herself to work (through the traffic...) - JK
 
  i also want one
01/12/2008 11:04
I think it will be so absolutely brilliant to have me one of those convoys?its just not that much fun anymore being stuck in traffic?I need to go home an relax after a long day at the office! So that is now at the top of my xmas list?a few cars with lovely blue lights that will help me skip/bulldoze traffic so I can get home in 5 minutes just because I want to! And while we are on the subject?.as annoyed as I am being stuck in the middle of an exceptionally busy intersection?waiting for some important person (must have been really big/very important because they needed 8 empty cars to ferry them wherever?) could the rest of the waiting public just wait a second or 2 so the poor idiot that had to wait and is now stuck in the middle of the intersection, give us a chance to get out of the way first before you bulldoze your way over me?without your blue lights. - Anon
 
  Who needs protection from whom?
01/12/2008 11:07
When I was a child I visited Ian Smith's house when he was Prime Minister in the "Chimurenga" war years. He had two policemen guarding his house and one lone driver in his official car when going to parliament etc. His peacetime successor, Bob, needs 100 armed men in a 30 vehicle convoy to venture out of his house, and has an army battalion to guard his house. Guess who is paranoid there? Guess who's getting paranoid in SA? Judging by the cavalcade, Zuma and Mbeki are the two most paranoid in SA - Philip
 
  Blue light convoys for our safety,
01/12/2008 11:10
The blue light convoys have been implemented for our safety. Imagine a bunch of drunk ministers driving through walls and houses all over the city. - Crimson
 
  Red Light District.
01/12/2008 11:12
Give them their own Red Light District instead...because they can screw you out of anything than anyone one of those woman that work those streets!!! And they get paid more for absolutely fokall!! - Win
 
  Bluelights?
01/12/2008 11:15
I'd like to know if these blue light brigades are only in JHB, as I haven't seen it in CT. Am I blind or is it only the JHB arrogance that is Public Servants who feel they are entitled to this Special Protection. If so then i'm glad to live in SlaapStad, where keep it simpler indedd is faster and better. - QueenGeek
 
  Gautrain versus blue lights
01/12/2008 11:15
Why not put them in the Gautrain with a blue light on top of the roof! We as peasants should make use of it shouldn't they also I mean they there to serve the Public which makes them not more entitled to these privileges .. I mean they only PUBLIC SERVANTS == note on SERVANTS for us the normal people! - gogga
 
  Blue Light
01/12/2008 11:18
The other day I was stuck in traffic on Summit Road in Bryanston and we had not moved in 20 mins. Next thing we had to make way for a blue light convoy - guess who was inside? Some politicians child being dropped off at school!! - TL
 
  Technology does work
01/12/2008 11:31
If these guys are late for a meeting they should just have a telephone conference and not rush around on the roads endangering others. I guess they feel its important to show their smug faces. - Technology does work
 
  This is Africa
01/12/2008 11:46
We have to live with it this is Africa. You will not see this type of action in the first world countries. I ahve seen on BBC the MP's drive themselves to work with no blue lights. These baboons of ours just like to feel important and they go to parlimunt to sleep anyway. - Mo
 
  Characteristics we don't want in our government
01/12/2008 11:54
The blue light convoys are a manifestation of the worst aspects of government: selfishness, self importance, arrogance, laziness, disrespect and a complete lack of caring for the citizens of this country. - afc
 
  Arrogant
01/12/2008 11:57
These Arrogant uneducated so called Politicians should be stripped of their positions since they don't seems to be accountable for anything they just waste our money and and abused everything with their power.Wake up you arrogant ........Go to Mandela for some advise he shall teach what it is to be humble........ - Liam Masters
 
  business oportunity
01/12/2008 12:04
Who would support me if I bought a million blue lights and sold them at the robots, complete with a can of black spray paint (blue light pack). We could all then spray our cars black, and plug-in our blue lights when the feeling took us. it would be compatible with your cigarette ligter and come complete with instructions booklet on best practices and when and how to use it. The best practises would include how to shoot out a tire as well as hand gestures and facial techniques. - MN
 
  Crimson the Jester
01/12/2008 12:05
HAhahaha, good one, Crimson. Don't forget the dangerous drunk judge(s). - Oom_Kosie
 
  Blue Light
01/12/2008 12:21
Are they russhing to their private business meetings while they neglect the work they were voted in for, like not even bothering to show up at parlement meetings? I think it is a disgrace and their so called power has gone to their heads. - Jean
 
  @ colin
01/12/2008 12:24
im convinced Colin works for the ANC. he defends their actions to the death. tell me colin how did you see, from the seat of your own car,that they were doing 200 in an 80km/h zone? - mp3's mentor
 
  How to lose an election...
01/12/2008 12:29
Just keeping behaving arrogantly, using blue light convoys to irritate the entire population. It is the most personal form of interaction the average citizen has with the ruling party, and the quickest way to lose popularity. COPE should use that fact. - Dave
 
  now what?
01/12/2008 12:56
Agreed. Amen. Hear, hear. Now let's take this observation past an internet article for us lucky ones, and take this info to the street, to remind our fellow countrymen who keep voting these fat cats in.Fortunately there are signs the average South African is not going to be fooled forever.I think each literate South African of every colour and flavour should have at least five serious conversations with each semi-literate South African. - kwk
 
  Careful now!
01/12/2008 12:58
Totally agree with you all,but let us be very careful not to generalise and to have a clear understanding of our responsibilities to make way for emergency blue light vehicles who does not abuse their powers in comparison to these convoy thugs, as you might find yourself in a rather precarious situation if you don,t! - Scouser
 
     
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