It's only a lie if you lose
26/03/2008 08:41  - (SA)  

Chris Roper

So Hillary Clinton made up a story about enduring sniper fire while on a visit to Bosnia, and that august body of opinion known as "The American People" (not to be confused with "The Village People," although as badly dressed) are upset because Clinton lied to them.

From way down here on the African continent, scarred survivors of a thousand and one Empire lies, it's hard to see what the fuss is all about. After all, the present US president got voted in for another term despite the fact that he lied about WMDs, so why shouldn't Hillary Clinton also have her Weapons of Made-up Destruction?

And why on earth are the American running hogs of capitalism, or the media as they prefer to be known, acting so surprised because a Clinton is a little economical with the truth?

That other Clinton guy, Bill, is of course famous for his own lie, when he proclaimed, "That woman never inhaled my penis", or whatever it was he said. That was also a lie about a WMD, or Weapon of Mini Dick to use the full term. Surely the American people are used to being lied to by now? Seriously, what's all the fuss?

The Hillary camp says Mrs Clinton didn't lie, she just "misspoke". Fantastic! Sometimes it's hard to believe that we still have a language called English. Why not just call it American and acknowledge that we've all lost the language wars? The way US politicians make English work for them would be an instructive lesson for Humpty Dumpty.

Some of you might have forgotten who Humpty Dumpty is, so let me remind you. He's a character in a famous American movie called Alice in Wonderland. Here's a snippet from the book that came out after the movie.

"'When I use a word,' Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, 'it means just what I choose it to mean - neither more nor less.'

"'The question is,' said Alice, 'whether you can make words mean so many different things.'

"'The question is,' said Humpty Dumpty, 'which is to be master - that's all.'"

Blame Disney

Beautiful stuff, and I'm sure Alice in Wonderland is required viewing for all American politicians. Hillary apparently also claims to have brought peace to Northern Ireland, which some people are saying is a slight exaggeration. But come on - Americans apparently believe they won World War II single-handedly, so why not elect a president who can creatively add to their list of foreign affairs triumphs?

I'm afraid I blame Walt Disney, the man who wrote the American Constitution, for this state of affairs. It appears to have always been difficult for American politicians to separate fact from fiction, and that's because American artists and writers have always been so damn good at creating fantastic fictional worlds that are so much better than the real thing. They're so good, that the rest of the world buys into American myths wholesale, and I use the word wholesale advisedly.

Even here in sunny South Africa, where corrupt politicians have flourished for many happy decades, people are choosing to believe in Barack Obama, the Great White Hope.

Many hardened news journalists have said to me how great his speech on race in America was, and how it should have been a South African politician making that speech. They seem to have forgotten that our politicians do make that speech, over and over, and nothing much changes. The only difference is that Barack Obama is being created in the spin labs of Atlanta and Hollywood, so we're more inclined to trust him.

If Obama wins, it'll be because Clinton lied. If Clinton wins, it'll be because she only misspoke. "'When I make a word do a lot of work like that,' said Humpty Dumpty, 'I always pay it extra.'"

And that's what it comes down to, I'm afraid. Whoever has the most money wins the race, and whoever wins the race gets to decide what history means for the foreseeable future.

Chris Roper is the Editor-in-Chief of 24.com, and a big fan of Lewis Carroll, the guy who wrote the book of the movie.

Send your comments to Chris.

Disclaimer: News24 encourages freedom of speech and the expression of diverse views. The views of columnists published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

 

 Yahoo

 

 Digg

 Del.icio.us

 Facebook

What is this?

 News24 on mobile

 News24 on facebook profile