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How coloured are you?
30/06/2008 13:07  - (SA)  

Want to know more?
Answerit can help.
  • Chinese 'not welcome' in SA?
  • Labour minister slammed
  • Chinese qualify for BEE
  • Cape Town - I am fairly dark-skinned with dark hair and have often been mistaken for being Portuguese, Greek, Italian and Israeli (but mostly Portuguese). I am actually half-German and half-Afrikaans.

    So when I told friends at the office that I had once also been mistaken for being coloured, they all burst out laughing.

    I was deeply and profoundly offended. So they took pity on me, and a few of my coloured co-workers began introducing me to the complex and evolved life of the Cape coloured. (I was told if you want to be coloured, you have to be from Cape Town).

    Apparently coloured people from Joburg don't really qualify. Sorry.

    The coloured lifestyle is an intricate and complicated puzzle with millions of confusing little pieces. It involves things like gatsbys, the Galaxy club, where you live, not only how you drink, but what you drink - and where.

    You've gotta like gatsbys

    For instance, a gatsby (for the uninitiated, this is a large roll with polony - I'm not calling it ham - and deep-fried chips. If it doesn't spill onto the ground when you try to eat it, it's not a gatsby).

    I like gatsbys, no problem. Ok, says a friend, but you have to drink brandy too. "With Klippies?", asks another colleague innocently, joining in the Coloured Education of Andrea. "No!" scream the coloured friends in horror...(as all Afrikaners know, Klipdrift is the exclusive domain of the Boerevolk.) No, I'm informed, with Betrams.

    So far so good, I'm prepared to do all that. The problem starts when I hear that I wouldn't be able to be a sturvey (that's an uppity coloured), which I was gunning for of course. I don't want to be a gangster from the Badlands! But my colleague is firm on this, I couldn't be a sturvey because apparently, I "rafel uit too much".

    At this point I'm beginning to get despondent. Then I hear that, as a coloured, I wouldn't be able to take my gatsby home and eat it with a knife and fork in front of the telly. No, it must be eaten on top of the bonnet of your car.

    Also, this has to happen late at night when you come back from a night at the Galaxy club. This is another problem - I'm not a clubber, after all, I'm virtually in an old-age home, being over thirty.

    How big are your mags?

    Then it gets more complicated - I'm asked how big the mags are on my car, what kind of music I listen to and whether I'd be prepared to undergo an intensive language course.

    Because, yes, for those of you who thought coloured people speak Afrikaans and English, think again. If you are really coloured you will know that anyone asking you "waar brand dit" is not referring to a fire in the neighbourhood, but is asking you where "it's happening" or the party is going on.

    I couldn't help wondering if the Chinese community in SA would be feeling the same sort of despair I was. In the past week, a Pretoria court ruled that they should from now on be classified as coloured and be included in the definition of "black people" in laws, including black economic empowerment legislation, which has been established to help previously disadvantaged groups.

    Following this groundbreaking ruling, the Labour Minister made some strange comments in the media, saying that he was now expecting Chinese people to behave more like black people (seeing as how they are now coloured people, I assume he meant - behave like coloured people.)

    I'm not sure if he thought they should start eating gatsbys and going to the Galaxy club. He also said they should start assimilating the coloured culture by learning a local language, which put in my mind some Chinese people driving up to an Asian noodle bar in a car with huge, shiny mags and asking the fella behind the counter, "Hoezit my bra, ek't lis vir 'n dite".*

    *Translation. Dite (pronounced like "date" with an i refers to being hungry and wanting some grub, mostly though, it refers to - you guessed it - a gatsby."

    (** Oh, before you type me the hate mail, I know not ALL coloured people drink Betram's and eat gatsbys or go to the Galaxy. Only the cool ones, of course...)

    Send your comments to Andrea.

    Disclaimer: News24 encourages freedom of speech and the expression of diverse views. The views of columnists published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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      Cool jazz, captain!
    30/06/2008 13:13
    aaahh, a trip down amnesia lane... - Thomas
     
      Dite is not pronounced "date"...
    30/06/2008 13:19
    It's pronounced the same way it is spelled. I prefer to "kap 'n baard", which is not chopping a beard, but also means having a meal. - Sean
     
      My people!
    30/06/2008 13:21
    LOL....so i'm not a cool coloured! - Smitter
     
      Racists!
    30/06/2008 13:26
    Who is the South African goverment to tell a race of people how they must be! - Sam
     
      This is a lot of stereotyping
    30/06/2008 13:29
    How could you publish this?I is far worse than Divid Bullard's piece. - Racist drivel
     
      eish
    30/06/2008 13:36
    please grow a sense of humour! I will actually sponsor you to buy one ..... - @ Racist drivel
     
      Gam
    30/06/2008 13:39
    Excuse me.......... What your friends are trying to turn you into doll, is call Cape Gam. Us "coloureds" aree the normal ones who refuse to act and speak like barbarians. Sorry I eat whatever I want to eat with whatever I want to. The colour of my skin does not dictate my style.. Sorry but I'm disgusted. - nicky
     
      COLOURED
    30/06/2008 13:40
    Ek's ook van die kaap my broer - scorpion
     
      @ Racist drivel
    30/06/2008 13:41
    Have you been listening what the labour minister has been saying?!?!?! And you call this racist?!?! Please! This is a humour piece. If you are goign to criticize it then you really don't have anything better to do... Great writing! - jane
     
      That sound like early 90's
    30/06/2008 13:41
    Betrams and gatsbye's well not after galaxy more like chilling on da pavilion on a friday and sat night lol..... - veyron
     
      How Colured are you"??????
    30/06/2008 13:44
    There is nothing like the "unique" Cape Coloured slang and I am very proud to be "coloured". - Wendy
     
      Like the article!
    30/06/2008 13:45
    Very funny, but I get your point for the Chinese people. - T dawg
     
      Crap
    30/06/2008 13:45
    I am a coloured, and I am not from Cape Town. This is the worst racist remarks that I have ever read in my life. How could you generalise like that. I've never eaten a gatsby, I don't drink klippies and do all the other crap that you've written. Why don't you go and help the Xenofobia victims if you don't know what to do with your time. - Verushca
     
      Nice article
    30/06/2008 13:47
    To 'Racist Drivel'. We should be able to make fun of one another. My colleagues and I do it all the time. We realise we have different ways of doing things and cherish the differences we have because of our race/tradition. Dont be so sensitive. - Liz
     
      OFFENDED FOR BEING MISTAKEN AS COLOURED?
    30/06/2008 13:47
    So being coloured is offensive? How racist is that. Why would you publish such a hateful piece, and yet fire David. Being mistaken for human is offensive if people like you belong to humity. - coloured
     
      chill ...
    30/06/2008 13:47
    everyone is sooooooooo serious these days! have a laugh... - mj
     
      Half Afrikaans and half German?
    30/06/2008 13:48
    Ouch! Talk about a lethal combination (and I thought my French and Irish mixed ancestry was bad!haha).In all seriousness though,our labour minister is a bit of a twit for making comments like those (mind you,he's just being consistent with the rest of his less then bright Cabinet colleagues). - The Truth
     
      Good one!
    30/06/2008 13:48
    "Apparently coloured people from Joburg don't really qualify. Sorry." Had such a good laugh and conclude that being a Cape Coloured living in Joburg makes me a "kullid" and I will have to be 're-named?' - Mixed race person
     
      This is 2008
    30/06/2008 13:51
    Yes it's funny to think back but...im not loosing any roots i know where i come from but cape slang for me has died a long time ago, I find it a bit pathetic hearing 60 year ols still speaking about "nommers" and crap i mean they parents wonder why our youth are struggling "stereotyping" we will amount to nothing but gangsters and drug dealers...who ever the colleagues are thats teaching you this should be ashamed....Yes it was fun in the 90's.....this 2008 - veyron
     
      Ag shame-hoe nou?
    30/06/2008 13:53
    Girl, as you yourself say you are not coloured, so what are you trying to say? You want to be coloured but don't fit in? Go see a therapist to sort out your identity issues, rather than expect coloured people to sort it out for you. PS self-identifying coloured people are not confined to Cape Town-although those you've spoken to clearly seem to (wrongly) believe so-poor misguided souls!PPS As I understand only SOME chinese people stand to benefit from AA policies by being classified coloured. - lekkalik
     
      Trypical
    30/06/2008 13:54
    I cant believe News24 published this rascist drivel and steriotype nonsense....BTW who is this chick coming here and posting this nonsense? - Kolobe
     
      @nicky
    30/06/2008 13:54
    firstly lekker story Andrea two thumbs up and secondly nicky....u aint no coloured i mean what coloured uses words like barbarians and dictate ??? hahaha...COCONUT ALERT!!!! - coloured manskap
     
      Ek's 'n Kypie innie hart
    30/06/2008 13:55
    My lanie, jy vat raak oppie eerste knyp! En as jou bene swak raak (het nie meer geld nie) vir 'n Gatsby, dan maak jy 'n "parcel" - snoek of stokvis met tjips in koerant papier toegedraai. Outstanding humour writing! - Jacques
     
      @ racist drivel
    30/06/2008 13:56
    If you don't like it, don't read it. I personally enjoyed the trip down memory lane ... well written Andrea. You need to get over yourself and enjoy this part of colored culture for what it is. There are so many different levels, embrace them all. People take life way too seriously. PS: "nicky" would be classed as a Sturvy colored - Craig
     
      sense of humour failure
    30/06/2008 13:57
    Racist drivel - this piece is what one would refer to a "tongue in cheek" ie - not serious and just for a laugh... don't be so sensitive... get a sense of humour... you are obviously in dire need of one... - leaving
     
      Stereotyping
    30/06/2008 13:58
    Speaking on behalf of my fellow chinas, (And I dont mean friends)this is a refreshing article! For you "wit ouens" stop complaining you had your chance,and to my fellow darkies, we used to be tjommies back in the days,we used to get gesuip and check out the gooses, so don't be so naar with us man, we your yellow brothers from another mother! Besides, who gives a damn us "geel gevaar" has been doing fine without the B&W's, yet we still afford the BMW's... - justin lai
     
      PROUD COLOURED - (and eduacated)
    30/06/2008 14:08
    Why do you write a column about a people you do not know - all you know amount us is what the media feeds you, that we are all gangsters and drunkards. I bet you have never been in a colourd township or neighborhood but still you have lost to say about who we are and what we are all about. I am a proud colourd educated with a degree in Accounting and only drink whisky - bet you wont believe that. - colin
     
      reading is fun
    30/06/2008 14:10
    coloured... please read again: she was not offended at being mistaken for a coloured person... she was "was deeply and profoundly offended" because her friends at the office all burst out laughing... - leaving
     
      You know why...
    30/06/2008 14:11
    China is moving in of Africa. Someone probably gets commission for this, and this will sure help some Chinese brother get xtra edge with tenders. Time to let go of race; as far as I know the Law of Race Classification has been abolished, therefore it is impossible to reliably determine according to the law which race you are from, and to which benefits you are entitled... - GotOut
     
      Oh Yes
    30/06/2008 14:12
    The good ol days - Trompie
     
      Funny article
    30/06/2008 14:12
    The sarcasm in this article is surely not to be taken seriously. It is a bit offensive but we have to admit that that's what Cape Gam is and it's not gonna change. Yes, we're not like that and that is not our style. But you mos now know that your not like that :) it's up to you to show them what you're really like. - franman
     
      @Verushca & Kolobe
    30/06/2008 14:12
    It's called satire... get a sense of humour! At Kolobe,we'll excuse you, you have never had a sense of humour or a good point in your life. - Andy
     
      The final analysis......
    30/06/2008 14:14
    which I challeng some one to refute is, that the most beautiful and exotic girls in this country..., are my cloured honeys. MWAH !!! - clifford
     
      Andrea
    30/06/2008 14:14
    Thanks. This was enjoyable reading. Ignore those who don't get your point. - Nyx
     
      coloured... learn to read
    30/06/2008 14:23
    So when I told friends at the office that I had once also been mistaken for being coloured, they all burst out laughing. I was deeply and profoundly offended." Get it now? - LM
     
      How coloured are you
    30/06/2008 14:25
    If we cannot laugh at each other what can we laugh at! Get over yourselves! Great article - Sad
     
      Lekker Read
    30/06/2008 14:28
    Ja some comments wont be so lekker not every colored is like that, but truthfully a good bunch is! - Whatever Man
     
      @ Kolobe & Colin
    30/06/2008 14:33
    Kolobe ... the word chick could also be classes as offensive, Mr Stereotype. And Colin, this is the way to spell EDUCATED. I'm now rather, let's say comfortable, in life and enjoy satire for what it is, I also have a degree, but I don't use it to forget my heritage. If you didn't do any of this, then it wasn't directed at you. - Craig or rather Craaker
     
      Proudly Sout Efrikan
    30/06/2008 14:39
    I can just come to the conclusion that all the coloureds or Gam who take offense to such a humorous article have lost touch with there inner being. I don't speak the Cape Coloured slang anymore up here in Jozi because I wouldn't be understood, but damn I love the language. Hou 'n skuif, gee 'n trek, daala 'n vy bob, minuute my broer, gettig bymekaar with 'n ou... miss it and love it all together - Claudia
     
      Great
    30/06/2008 14:40
    I enjoyed this column, nice read and lekke laughs... have to say though, I've never drank Betrams (we used to drink Conniseur back in the day) and I never went to Gala (Company used to be the club of choice) :) Colin, I'm also an educated coloured, but i'm not forgetting my root and about what we used to do in our youth :) - Ekke
     
      If all else fails
    30/06/2008 14:41
    If all fails we always have to go to the race card ... its a sign of weakness if you think you better than another person ... we are all the same - has@hotmail.com
     
      country
    30/06/2008 14:46
    when I read these comments by fellow south africans, I can only say: what a pathetic bunch off people we are... - wtf
     
      Proud to be a joburg coloured
    30/06/2008 14:49
    Thank goodness i am not a coloured from Cape Town - bushie from joburg
     
      let it go guys...
    30/06/2008 14:53
    One thing that this article has proven is that we dont stand together. Look at the remarks you are making to each other, does this describe unity to you? Talking about how many degrees you have and blatantly saying u have no affiliaton (spelling) to so called "Gam". Guys, you have just proven to the whole country that "coloureds" dont stick together. well done!!! To all my coloured people out there, I salute you! Well done on being the person that you are! - franman
     
      How Coloured are you?
    30/06/2008 14:55
    The previous regime succeeded in tainting people with colour; ie. white , black, coloured etc. Oh yes I live in Lansdowne, I don't go clubbing etc and enjoy the occasional gatsby. It's a meal like any other. I don't drink and I abhor being called a coloured. That reminds me to much of the previous political stooges like Sonny Leon, Allen Hendrickse etc etc. I am a person who fought his battles side by side with others during the seventies and eighties and yes the word coloured offends deeply. - Amien
     
      coloured
    30/06/2008 15:00
    I don't understand what the fuss is about I'm a coloured and proud to be one, but what does the colour of your skin matter in Gods eyes we are all his children. I've had it with the colour issue you either to light of complexion to be called a black or to dark of complexion to be called white. - heima
     
      Coloured isn't race.
    30/06/2008 15:03
    Coloured is culture. We deserve to fly the banner for our culture. If you'd like to know more about this colourdness, head on over to www.bruin-ou.com. - The Rooster
     
      Hilarious
    30/06/2008 15:04
    Please ignore the comments about your column being racist. Those people don't get it, although you did role rough shod over a few "Kullardisms". Let me just say that because I listened to rock music, I was always called sturvy, or I was told "you keep-yourself-white". While these are criticisms, like most things from the Cape Flats, they are VERY tongue-in-cheek, and I always found acceptance wherever I went. P.S. from what I remember about Galaxy, most ppl were in there 30s - "Sturvy" Cape Kullard
     
      Thank you
    30/06/2008 15:09
    Great column babe, I truly needed this on this dreary, cold Monday!!! We have a young coloured guy who is desparately trying to get us "old" whities to get with the times! We (the coloured guy included) are in constant hysterics trying to learn the lingo and accent, have you even heard a whitey try to get the accent right? Thanks again - to all the guys out there screaming RACIST - please, please get a life - Copper
     
      Brilliant
    30/06/2008 15:10
    This was brilliant... never had such a lekker laugh in a while... mense must stop being so uptight... one thing though, vibe also use to ruk back in the day... aweh, lol - V
     
      PROUD
    30/06/2008 15:11
    I am proud to be a COLOURD as I do not allow any other person to define me or what it means to be a colourd. - colin
     
      Well written (for a whitey, lol!)
    30/06/2008 15:12
    Eish...I really enjoyed this column! Yes, and just as I expected, the usual comments, "racist cloumn" "I am not a COLOURED" (though don't you dare call me black) "I don't know the Galaxy" and "what is a gatsby" Ja, right! I am a coloured person (from Cape Town of course!) who lives abroad and ja... I sooo miss regte Athlone mutton Gatsbys (met 'n peach Frulati nogal!), Betrams and the Gal! In the meantime I also love my sushi, Moet and Dragon-i Night Club. But I'm Coloured and proud of it! - KaapseKlonkie
     
      Duidelik Andrea
    30/06/2008 15:13
    Nay Nay jtulle klippies brand a man se keel. LOL :) dis viceroy met water. Betrams is virrie sturvies. En die Space het geruk. Boetie Buck - Boetie Buck
     
      @proud coloured
    30/06/2008 15:20
    Geez dude chill with the whole "I'm educated" schpiel. You're embarrassing yourself. Degree, degree, whiskey but you can't spell to save your life. I'm coloured and also have a degree. Difference is, my english are very good hahahaha. Why is it so important for sturvy coloureds to "other" themselves from the bertrams-drinking, gatsby-eating, slang-spewing lot? In doing so you imply that they are less than you. And in that you prove them to be already better. - Monique
     
      This country...
    30/06/2008 15:20
    Looking at some of these comments I have no more doubt that there is no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow nation. We are so sensitive and self-centered we cannot see the funny in anything. Kolobe, please find another hobby. - Poepol
     
      coloured
    30/06/2008 15:21
    Cape coloured now staying in Durban for the past four years.This article diffently took me back to home to Gatsby and Bertys not forgetting the Gala as we use to call it. Coloured people in Durban are secluded to Wentworth i hardly get to see them much in the city...dont know why - duidelik
     
      good for chuckle...
    30/06/2008 15:24
    Your article is light hearted and should be interpeted as such. Please people, stop pulling out the race card every time someone says something you don't like. PS... I do believe it should be Red Heart Rum & Coke, not so? - Marcy
     
      Kykie hooorie, my broe
    30/06/2008 15:26
    The whole race classification thing is crazy, man! Although in order to get BBBEE clearance it is very important to get this right. And all the comment posters (or should I say posers) with their negative comment - Get a gatsby en coke, en chill. - Ladnar
     
      Come on Kolobe
    30/06/2008 15:32
    Hey Kolobe, In every column you deign to say something, it's always complaining. Do you have anything nice to say? Do you perhaps have a contribution to make? Well, if the answer to either question is yes, don't be shy - make a positive contribution or put a sock in it! - jack
     
      you forgot the frulatie
    30/06/2008 15:33
    nice humour well written!! You forgot one thing we wash that gatsby down with frulatie or Double O. This suites my pallet. And that proud coloured with his accounting degree that drinks whiskey that tell him my Nike takkies cost more than his education. - Skapie
     
      Educated but still coloured
    30/06/2008 15:34
    This is to Colin, I'm also an educated coloured but that doesn't mean that I've lost my sense of Humour. Andrea is writing about stereotypes, which if you didn't know doesn't apply to every single coloured! So no need to take offence! - Dee
     
      Good old home
    30/06/2008 15:36
    It's awesome to see, from a South African, living abroad that we can still have a laugh at ourselves. (well some of us of course). I would think that if we as the youth, 18-30's can have a laugh at each other, in reason, surely you guys could too? - Dale
     
      To Craig & coloured manskap
    30/06/2008 15:40
    Small things amuse small minds and you 2 are at the top of the line when it comes to stereotyping your own. Sies!!!!!!! Don't call me names cause I don't do what you do.... - nicky
     
      Superior Colours
    30/06/2008 15:42
    I went to primary school in the 80's, Afrikaans with fair skin, blue eyes and light hair. Shape of my eyes looks Oriental and some of the kids used to tease me and ask if my father was a Chinese? Even the Grade 1 teacher contacted my mother to ask if my father was an Asian. As a 7 year old I had first hand experience of how racist people can be and I always felt like a outcast among my "own people". Education starts at home, parents should be a role model for their children.... - CPT
     
      LOL
    30/06/2008 15:43
    I must say, people have lost their sense of humour, i reaLLy enjoyed this piece..very funny, peepLe must wake up and LOL a bit...One thing that this article has proven is that we dont stand together. Look at the remarks you are making to each other, does this describe unity to you? - cL
     
      yea colin, real educated...
    30/06/2008 15:53
    judging from your spelling i'd say your degree isnt worth the paper its printed on "my bra"... - mp3's mentor
     
      Racists?? where?
    30/06/2008 15:54
    Clearly the people complaining that this is racist are the sturvy 'kullits' or the non-coloureds - lol. Just because we love gatsbies and use our own slang, doesn't mean we're barbaric. A lot of us can relate and for goodness sake, with all the depressing news we have to read every day and see on the news, articles like this are a good laugh. And for the record I'm a Cape coloured living in Jozi now - the thing I miss most is coloured people. - SQ
     
      Yeah, let it go!!
    30/06/2008 15:54
    I fully agree with Franman, we dont stick together. I too have the degree and moved out of the hood a long time ago but like it or not - a large majority of our people DO eat still gatsbys and drink Berties... trust me, there is nothing better than a gatsby from Dish after a big night out(that was last Saturday night - IN 2008). Our slang English/Afrikaans combo is colourful and I am not offended by the article at all. Would it have been different if the article was written by a coloured person? - Cape Town Coloured
     
      Stereotyped
    30/06/2008 15:56
    All coloureds are different. Don't stereotype. Not all coloureds drink and talk kombuis Afrikaans or are gangsters. This article might be funny but it is racism in disguise. - Roger
     
      How Kullid are you?
    30/06/2008 15:57
    Ayeyaaaaa... You know my website has gotten flack for being too coloured!! What is being coloured? I think the author of this article got the basic, but then also mentions the complexities of being a coloured! And there are so many people that would love to discuss this topic further, so should you wish to... don't hesitate to go to www.kakduidelik.co.za and praat julle in julle ma jits van kullid wies! LOL!!! - Ferril
     
      hehe...
    30/06/2008 16:00
    Good article I must say. Remembered the days we used to go to Goodhope centre for the Cape malay choir fest. then go down to the Grand Parade for a lekker gatsby and Fiesta juice. - Nunzio
     
      Tjomies
    30/06/2008 16:01
    Very funny,a good read after all the other depressing news around. We know its just stereotypes on the coloured community,but all races have stereotypes which get used for humour. - Dredger
     
      What makes you coloured
    30/06/2008 16:03
    We the only country in the world where there are blacks, coloureds. Everywhere there are only two groups you either black, asian, caucasion or latin. I hate this term coloured. It make people think like in the past that they are better than a certain race. - Puffy
     
      Coloured
    30/06/2008 16:16
    I'm pne proud coloured not blck but coloured lekker article bra... You forgot to mention the car's soos die Toys Opel bins aka datsuns nissans and die res... soe Next time stiek uit by us and we'll gooi you some moves . - tauzty
     
      Sense of humor failure
    30/06/2008 16:20
    No wonder South Africa is stuffed. All those who took this article seriously and thought that "coloured" people in general are being stereotyped, have had a sense of humour failure. You are not as important as you think you are and if your sensitivities have been offended, then all I can say is.. shame, you poor, serious, sanctimonius, boring as hell, filled with self-importance plonkers much like the accountant fellow who drinks whiskey (I rest my case). - Kevin
     
      Who cares what the punks who work with us think?
    30/06/2008 16:23
    I'm a 27yr old coloured male from Corrie. I'm educated, successful and a home owner in a 'white area'. Most of my coloured friends are in the same position. But, I love my coloured people. I loved my childhood. Walking home from s'gal, visiting the meddies, oupa specials, rum dashed with coke and a china fruit... I could go on! Weather it's Athlone, Eldo's, Eersterust or Die Kas, keep on keeping on, my bruino's. Oh, before I forget, you cannot touch the beauty of a coloured sister. HOLA HOSH!!! - bogi
     
      Very good!
    30/06/2008 16:24
    Loved the article Andrea. Sounds like you have a great sense of humour. Coupled with your "fairly dark skin", you're probably my type. Are you busy Friday night? - Lemming
     
      come on
    30/06/2008 16:25
    What the hell is wrong with people? Half of you are a bunch of sensitive ar*e wipes with no sense of humour. I don't cry when I get called "soutie" or "rooinek" or whitey etc. I laugh along and respond accordingly. STOP BEING ANAL South Africa. - The fisherman
     
      loosen up
    30/06/2008 16:27
    people this is funny and nice those who say this is racist needs to get a life dont take everything personal pleaseee - Zola
     
      Andrea
    30/06/2008 16:29
    This was a very, very enjoyable piece and I thank you for it. Scanning the comments, it is clear that so many of our citizens are filled with bitterness and nothing else, but please know that anyone with a decent sense of interpretation will know that you intended absolutely no malice or stereotyping, and your affection for the 'gam' lifestyle was also well evident between the lines. High fives, and thanks once again. - Jaco
     
      Why should colour issue be so sensative at a country called rainbow nation?
    30/06/2008 16:38
    They were not white enough in the bad days, however, they are black enough in the new days. Congratulations my Chinese brothers and sisters! - Tygerburger
     
      coloured what coloured
    30/06/2008 16:38
    the only thing i know about coloured they get drunk,fight..swear's break things, stabs sanything that moves - kaiser
     
      Sad
    30/06/2008 16:39
    read the article in anticipation that after your sensless steriotypical drivel there would be some positive highlights to being coloured...like our contribution to the struggle, the arts and Cape Towns positive charms in general. Names like Taliep Petersen spring to mind. I dont know about being a "sturvey". In all other races its considered progress to rise above - get an education and speak proper English but no not when you are coloured! U know nothing so "HOU JOU BEK" Hows that for coloured? - Valda
     
      Ola South African -
    30/06/2008 16:41
    I think I appreciate the diversity of S.A. and the passion of humanity. To me personal identity is very important. I am a proudly Mosotho South African, Finish en klaar. I am not gonna be fooled by people who preached about abolishing of the colour. I am always aware what other races' perceptions are on S.A. Africans. So I won't turn a blind eye on that... - Mokaobere
     
      Entertaining read.
    30/06/2008 16:42
    Butbutbut now I wanna be a coloured from Cpt :( - kam
     
      Verushca, kolobe, colin
    30/06/2008 16:43
    Comeon get a sense of humour and stop being so tight arsed out everything... - nWo
     
      @ Colin!! Ask for a refund on your tuition fees...
    30/06/2008 16:50
    Now pay attention, this is how you spell: educated, coloured,neighbourhood, won't. The free lesson ends here. So, here is also the answer to your question: YOU BET we don't believe you! Dom doos. - Q80
     
      @coloured
    30/06/2008 16:54
    Maybe what she meant was: "she was offended that ppl were laughing at her being mistaken for a colored" and not "she was offended at being mistaken for a colored" Why not clarify first before you jump to conclusions? - Pensive
     
      @colin
    30/06/2008 16:58
    Colin, i believe she states at the beginning that her "education" was from her "colored co-workers". Whats with you ppl not reading the entire article. Your like a dog with a bone, you pick on something and cant let go... - Pensive
     
      Coloured to the roots
    30/06/2008 17:13
    There is a lot love/hate going on about being a coloured or not,but in all honesty if you have not experienced the culture then you will not and cannot understand the humour in it. Identifying with your culture is as important as breathing, some things are instinctive and this often mistaken as being racist.Black, brown, white or coloured I am proud to be South African. So what if you have not eaten a gatsby or had some klippies and cola.Proudly SA - JR
     
      Amien and the term 'coloured'
    30/06/2008 17:16
    Amien : What do you prefer to be referred to as regards to racial group then? - Confused
     
      What is wrong with these comments...
    30/06/2008 17:22
    The best thing about this article and the reason why so many people seem offended by it, is that it in so many aspects so true. If you cannot laugh at this then it proves that you are not from Cape Town or just don't get Cape Town. Here in the Cape we can laugh at ourselves. And if I may be blunt without the people being described in this article Cape Town will stop existing, next you will start shouting that the klopse on new years is racist. - LMAO
     
      Proudly Coloured
    30/06/2008 17:23
    What a lekker article. I'm not from CT but did the Gal and Gatsby and ooh so many Bertrams. So the article brought about a chuckle and fond memories of a funfilled youth as a coloured laaitie. so far from home it's great to have a laugh at who we really are, even if now we drink Blue Label and wear Armani - dont forget your roots and stop being so damn touchy... - Dubai Expat
     
      Jaaaaassuuuus
    30/06/2008 17:27
    I can't believe the okes beetching and moaning here... This is quite a funny article (although I've seen funnier). Come now, chill out, have a laugh. Stereotypful jokes can very funny. If you don't see the funny side of this, you can't be a true South African... - Fast Dave
     
      Shirley, Goodness and Mercy
    30/06/2008 18:24
    As one of the educated coloured poets of our country would say, Christopher van Wyk, we can learn to laugh at each other. I was born in Zambia in the same year of apartheid creation and I want to get to know the people I wasn't permitted to know then and yes I have been into a township or two or three. People need people, race should be unimportant, that's what we voted for. We're all one blood when we are cut. I have friends of varying colours. - GailC
     
      Colour is just another label
    30/06/2008 18:31
    like crazy, retard, racist. I walked past a display in a big bookstore not so long ago and got sick to my stomach for the people who were so discriminated against because of colour and hair. Can you believe it was a bench with "Whites Only"? What poor and offensive taste they showed using that as their centrepiece even if it was to do with 16 June and SA week. - GailC
     
      @ Clifford...
    30/06/2008 18:50
    Couldn't agree more, our coloured honeys are some of the best - but that's what I like best about our Rainbow nation: we've got gorgeous chocolate babes, lovely coloured honeys, stunning Indian chicks, and that's before I even get on to the Asian and pale-skinned ladies that live here... ...Damn, but it's good to live in SA!!! - Rodders
     
      Lighten up (not skinwise) all of you!
    30/06/2008 19:07
    Eish my broer, wat kan ek se!! When people (bushies, whiteys, darkies and all the Surf colours in between!)get on their high horse as they have become too good to remember their roots + laugh at the weirdness of this country now. Why does anyone hate being called what they are? Whether it is white, black, coloured, pink or yellow. Yellow is a 'colour' - so is black + white for that matter! So in actual fact WE ARE ALL COLOUREDS!!! Also very few 'whites' are 'white', PINK is more the colour!:-D - white coloured South African!
     
      Andrea
    30/06/2008 19:07
    at over 30, you must have gotten your info from coloured youngsters who don't even know where they come from, they ridicule and make fun of themselves ---- that is not how coloured people are defined. Your story reads well, it just missed the comical coons! youngsters across the races are the greasy eaters, not me and people of my ilk. Off to salmon and rye now. Goodbye. - Quarter-German-half coloured
     
      Innie Kaap In
    30/06/2008 19:30
    I have lived in and seen many parts of the world. Never have I met salt of the earth peoples as the REAL people ?vannie Kaap`. All races , all tastes in Brandy......Andrea is confused. But in an innocent way. All of us ?vannie Kaap?, are of colour ..... with the good fortune not to be from the dull North ..... Cape Town has the right to be a country on its own.... who needs mielies or gold nuggets when you have the mooiste cherries in the world ! - BF
     
      Cape Kullid, what what
    30/06/2008 19:35
    Nice piece Andrea, you should vie to Durban for a month or so. Newlands, Wenties, Greenwood Park and Sydenham - there'll be plenty material for you. Oh and da food is better than polony and chips. Beans bunny and coke is da way - but also on da bonnet. Ignore dem uptight comments - us kullids have some sensitive types too you know. A little edukashin and suddenly we cannot laugh at ourselves anymore... - Durban Bushie
     
      racist
    30/06/2008 19:40
    I found this article to be racist. How dare you generalize like that. I'm sure there would be a bigger outcry if this was about how to be a black or a white. And what do you mean by 'uppity' coloured? I've seen how the media represents coloureds when they create South African films, animations and plays. It is surprising how the coloured person is the stupid characters with that slow, retarded Cape coloured accents giving us all a bad reputation!! - kim
     
      just relax....
    30/06/2008 20:37
    What a mixed response to a humorous observation. Over the years, people in divided communities do develop different habits and a different ?lingo?. Many have class systems, prominent in some (India) and more subtle in other societies (England). A little bit of poking fun about the obvious differences between those societies trying to live together can do no harm. One way to forget apartheid, years after it finished, is to laugh about the results. - Benzo
     
      cloured
    30/06/2008 20:49
    I am coloured (not colored as the americans spell it and the wAY SOME FOOLS USED.)and has a degree as well. But I love a gatsby and did my clubbing in the Gala years back, dont speak the 'taal' up here in Jozi but miss the life and culture desperately. So for all you sturvey coloureds that responded ',n ghal ve hele amil.' - enrico
     
         
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