Missing kids: You feel so helpless

2003-05-23 11:40

Annie Olivier

Johannesburg - "Whenever winter arrives, I always find myself wondering if she's got a warm bed to sleep in and a plate of food. I miss her terribly."

Vincent Adams's eyes well over with tears as he recounts how his daughter, Shaunice, disappeared 11 years ago from in front of her aunt's house in Westbury, Johannesburg. She wasn't even two years old.

He wipes his tears away before admitting Shaunice is still on all his official documents. He's convinced she's still alive.

Adams, like hundreds of parents whose children have vanished, is emotionally drained from waiting - for a call, an unexpected knock at the door, a glimmer of hope.

Their never-ending search for Shaunice has taken the Adamses - who have another daughter, Shante, 7, and a son Romano, 18 - from Cape Town to Pietermaritzburg and Hammanskraal.

Two years ago, they thought they'd found her in Pretoria-West, and even had a DNA test done.

But, it came up negative and they didn't get the chance to have it repeated.

An emotional Romano said this week: "If anyone asks me how many children there are {in our family), I always say three. I'll never give up on Shaunice."

Shaunice's mother, Joyce, couldn't believe how someone could have abducted her daughter.

"Why must people take a child away from its parents and break their hearts?"

"Surely God wouldn't have given me a child if He didn't think I was capable of caring for her.

"It's humiliating, because it feels as though I'm not worthy of being called a mother."

She believes although an abducted child may be well looked after, nothing can replace a parent's love.

Was missing for four days

Carel Neetling's daughter was abducted two years ago in Proklamasieheuwel, Pretoria.

He says he was overwhelmed by a feeling of helplessness when Nadia, who was seven at the time, went missing.

She was gone for four days before being thrown out of a car in front of a block of flats on the East Rand.

"You feel guilty because there are no answers and you want to do something, but can't. I've never felt so lost in my life."

He says although Nadia is living a normal life after her traumatic experience, she probably will never be the same.

"She's not as spontaneous as she used to be and easily becomes withdrawn. We hope she outgrows it."

Neethling says the incident shook his faith in people and he's become extra protective about his children.

- Beeld