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Gay couple plan legal wedding
14/11/2006 21:11 - (SA)
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| Lesbians Bathini Dambuza, left, and Lindiwe Radebe, who are planning to marry legally, show off their engagement rings in Johannesburg. (Denis Farrell, AP) |
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Johannesburg - Lindiwe Radebe and Bathini Dambuza have been engaged for a year. Now, they want to take their relationship to the next step.
The couple from Soweto hope to be among the first gay people to take advantage of the Civil Unions Bill that was passed by South Africa's national assembly on Tuesday, recognising gay unions.
"I can't wait," said Radebe, 25, an activist with the Forum for the Empowerment of Women, which supports black lesbians.
Dambuza, 22, a local tour guide, wears a pretty diamond-and-gold engagement ring that Radebe gave her about a year after they met.
They decided to get engaged to show their commitment to each other and not because they were expecting the bill to come into effect.
But, getting married will change their lives, they said.
Homosexuality largely taboo
"For some people marriage means nothing, it is just a piece of paper.
"But, we want that symbolism of having a legally binding document of our love," said Radebe.
The bill is a first for a continent where homosexuality is largely taboo and the two young women are proud of South Africa's broad-minded constitution that has ensured their relationship will be made legal.
"It is something big for us to get this recognition. I think we are very fortunate," said Radebe.
South Africa in 1996 was the first country to adopt a constitution that protected people from discrimination based on sexual orientation and the country has an active and open gay community.
But, legal protection does not guarantee acceptance or tolerance, especially for gay black men and women. The reality is often loneliness, fear, rape, violence and, sometimes, even murder.
So, Radebe and Dambuza know not to expect same-sex marriages to be easily accepted by more-conservative sectors of society.
"Now, the struggle will begin. Now, you will hear all sorts of remarks," said Radebe.
"We have always had to fight. But people will have to get used to it, said Dambuza.
While the couple haven't set a date yet and are unlikely to opt for an old-fashioned white wedding, they are full of talk about their plans.
"We want it to be a big party," said Dambuza, adding that they expect to see a number of their gay friends also get married.
Want the legal protection
The couple also are keen to have children and hope that by getting married it will be easier to adopt or become parents.
They also want the legal protection it will give each other in case of emergency.
"Imagine if something happens to one of us and your family come and take all that we have worked for.
"It is quite important for us to have that safety and security. There are many things that are dependent on being married," said Radebe.
- SAPA
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