Parents: The past that moulded our tomorrow

2017-06-29 06:01
OpinionThembile Ndabeni

OpinionThembile Ndabeni

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“Lentw’ilivili iyajika-jika, namhla nguwe ngomso ndim. Musan’ukwenza ngenkohlakalo”.

This song was very popular in the era of Radio Bantu, which was later renamed Radio Xhosa and yet again the current Umhlobo Wenene.

Growing up, our parents took care of us until we were somewhat old enough to take care of ourselves.

Think from when your mother carried you long before you were born until the age you are in now. She prioritised you from the day you existed. What happened to her mattered less, as long as you were safe.

Ask those who were around about the joy and celebrations when you arrived.

Your arrival was not perceived as burdensome despite the extra mouth and clothes for the body.

A child becomes the most valued and cared for among other souls in the households.

Still not able to express yourself, your mom had to be there the moment you started crying.

Sometimes it was caused by the fact that all you needed was a massage, or your body’s reaction to the need to sleep.

All these among other chores that she performed.

The workplace was also where mothers were underpaid, degraded, demeaned and disrespected.

Mother was there when you took your first steps and started child speak.

Mum becomes the best teacher when you start school.

It is never easy for parents who try their best to make sure that you become something in life.

Now that they are older and unable to do things on their own, isn’t your turn to play their former role.

Instead of love and respect they have become just a burden.

It seems the conditions you present are not conducive for complementing their needs.

You never went to bed on an empty stomach.

You don’t even check the condition of the house they live in.

Even if you see a fault you don’t even dare try to fix it or hire someone else to. What about their health and other necessities?

Parents did all they could to make sure that our lives were better than the previous day.

From the little they had they made sure we survived.

Even as we were helpless, they were not fed-up with us.

Now it’s our turn. They appreciated us, even baby-sat us, but why don’t we do the same.

Each time you hurt them, you must know you are putting a minus in their lives.

Crying, acting in their funerals and buying them flowers when dead is hypocrisy of the worst kind.

Give them flowers (love, caring, support, and respect) while they are still alive!

  • Thembile Ndabeni is a freelancer, a researcher and social commentator, who holds Masters Degree in politics.

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