'I'm fatter. . . and so much happier!'

By Nici De Wet
07 March 2017

Forget about starving yourself to achieve so called happiness, do the opposite – so says a British woman whose before-and-after pictures have gone viral.

“Every day, we see so many before-and-after weight-loss pictures,"says Megan Jayne Crabbe, a body positive blogger who has suffered from body image problems and eating disorders in the past. "I started posting reverse before-and-afters just to show people that happiness really isn’t a size and that you can be happy in the body that you have, even if it is bigger than it once was."

"Wait so you just decided to RUIN your body?" Nah, I just stopped torturing myself every day for not fitting an image I was never supposed to be. · "But you look so much healthier to me before." That's funny, you looked so much more intelligent to me before you equated health with weight and forgot that mental health is health too. · "You could have stayed the same and loved your body, you didn't need to get fat." I could have stayed the same and spiralled back into the eating disorder that almost killed me when I was 15. I could have kept starving myself and obsessively working out for hours everyday but it never would have lead me to self love. No matter how much weight I lost there was always still something to hate. And sure, people don't NEED to gain weight to find their self love, this is just what my body needed to do to match up to my mental freedom. THIS IS MY HAPPY BODY. · "But surely you can't be happy looking like that now, I could never be happy in that body." I didn't think I could either, but as it turns out, happiness isn't a size. And I wasted far too many years believing that it was. Now I'm not going to stop letting people know that they deserve happiness exactly as they are. They deserve to live now, not 10 pounds from now. They deserve that mental freedom. So to every person reading this: I hope you get your freedom too, however it might look. I'll be cheering you on every step of the way. ????? P.s. these are all comments I received on my last before/after picture, luckily for me, they just make me want to keep going even more ?

A post shared by Megan Jayne Crabbe ? (@bodyposipanda) on

In the “before” photo, the 23-year-old looks athletically slim in pink work out gear. However in the “after” shot, she dons pink lingerie and looks far more curvier. “THIS IS MY HAPPY BODY,” the bodyposipanda blogger writes, describing how she “stopped starving herself and obsessively working out” and is much happier at a heavier weight. “Happiness isn't a size. And I wasted far too many years believing that it was.” Read more: Former Miss SA finalist shares a transformation pic of a VERY different kind She says she was at her thinnest when the “before” photo was taken. “I was miserable; I was torturing myself. I was working out, like, three hours every day and eating so little. I was hungry and moody and miserable and I still wasn’t happy with my body."

So yesterday I did a bopo wardrobe blitz. I got rid of everything that no longer fits because of this beautiful bit of extra chub I'm rocking lately. I didn't vow to diet myself back into the clothes like I used to. My peace of mind is way more important than any piece of fabric! During the clear out I found these - my old Spanx. I used to squeeze myself into them every single time I wore a dress, because I bought into the idea that if my stomach wasn't flat, I wasn't worthy of being seen. I'd go hungry all day, sweat my life away, and take a million trips to the bathroom just to roll them back up. I wish I could have realised that it was okay to just wear the damn dress and let my stomach be free! I didn't need to look as toned as possible to deserve going out. I didn't need to live in fear of being caught at the wrong angle and someone seeing that *GASP* MOST TUMMIES ARE NOT COMPLETELY FLAT. And I seriously could have saved myself from so much dehydration. So the Spanx were the final thing on the clear out pile. And if you're still holding onto items of clothing that only serve to make you uncomfortable and look smaller than you are, take this as your permission to get rid of them. Sure, if they bring you joy, keep them, but if they don't, let them go. And let those glorious tummies be free! ????? Undercrackers by @curvykate ?

A post shared by Megan Jayne Crabbe ? (@bodyposipanda) on

Fast forward 18 months and she couldn't be happier. “I never thought I’d be able to be happy in this body, this body that isn’t a size 6, that isn’t supertoned and superlean, but it’s soft and it’s comfortable for me."

Way to go girl!

Sources: US Magazine, Instagram

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