Pondering

By admin
19 June 2014

If walking is good for your health...Tap here for the punchline.

If walking is good for your health, postmen would be immortal. A whale swims all day and only eats fish and drinks water, but is still fat. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives for 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run and does mostly nothing yet it lives for 150 years. So why should I exercise?

Now here’s what I’ve discovered:

I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.

My wild oats are best enjoyed with prunes and all-bran cereal.

I finally got my head together, but now my body is falling apart.

Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

If God wanted me to touch my toes he’d have put them on my knees.

If all is not lost, then where the heck is it?

It was a whole lot easier to get older than to get wiser.

Some days you’re the top dog; some days you’re the lamppost.

I wish the buck really did stop here; I sure could use a few of them.

Kids in the backseat can cause accidents.

Accidents in the back seat can cause kids.

It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

The world only beats a path to your door when you’re in the bathroom.

When I’m finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.

It’s not hard to meet expenses; they’re everywhere.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . . I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I’m “here after”.

GLORIA DRYDEN, EMAIL

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