Here’s what it all means

2012-06-09 15:23

The ANC’s Mangaung national conference is developing its own language as campaigners get into gear.

While the party’s leaders have tried to stopper debate until October, the campaign is already in top gear.

Here is our handy, quick guide to help you.

Anything but Zuma campaign
This is also known as the ABZ campaign and is basically a loose and rudderless group of ambitious flotsam and jetsam who plan to end President Jacob Zuma’s leadership of the governing party at Mangaung, Free State, come December.

At the moment, its self-appointed leader is Human Settlements Minister Tokyo Sexwale, who has wanted to be president since the year dot.

He is quite terrible at housing and lacks passion for bricks and mortar, so he has taken to being a campaigner against climate change à la Al Gore.

When he is not sailing to Antarctica, the charismatic and charming Sexwale is going around the country very volubly praying for the stand-in police commissioner Nhlanhla Mkhwanazi and speaking out against the climate of fear gripping South Africa’s security sector.

The real leader of the ABZ campaign is Deputy President Kgalema Motlanthe, but he will only show his hand on the eve of voting at Mangaung – and maybe not even then.

The Second Transition campaign

This is the 100% JZ campaign remix.

Its most voluble campaigner is Deputy Correctional Services Minister Ngoako Ramatlhodi, who would really like a proper job.

For two weeks in a row, he has said South Africa is now in a second transition, where courts and the media will be dealt with as the pesky flies in the ointment they are.

This is a populist campaign run by communists in ANC colours.

The real leader of this campaign is President Zuma, though he is still pretending he does not want a second term. And the real, real leader is gruff Gwede Mantashe, who is ANC secretary-general and therefore king of Mangaung.

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