If walking our talk was football, we’d be Bafana

2013-08-26 10:00

This month, Pitbull dropped a new track and the collective IQ of the planet dropped: “I can’t believe it, white girl got some ass I wanna see it; Black girl got a ass, it ain’t a secret,” he raps.

Real talent gets the racism and sexism into one lyric. And DJs seem to miss the irony, saying: “Fight sexism, and next up Pitbull.” Misogyny with a chiskop.

I am not a fan of DJs. How do you respect someone whose job it is to press play? But really it’s celebs in general, those middle class mind-dumps with heads so far up their own behinds you could sprinkle nuts on them and sell them as doughnuts.

They have social power. Because they are famous they seem to think the reason people listen is because they have something worth saying. You’ve never heard Trevor Manuel say: “What we really need is DJ Milkshake’s opinion.”

Celeb culture often reinforces inequality. Top Billing should just be honest and call itself “S**t you will never have”.

Anthropologically, “youth culture” is usually just a factory for the middle class. Poor youth want a house first, then house music. The ANC Youth League under Juju was acting like it was the other way around.

Do you know Kim Kardashian now has two sex tapes? Her partner, Kanye West, also has one. When their kid asks how he was made, they have the actual video.

Now Zwelinzima Vavi is trying to normalise sex in the office. How do you pomp a junior worker in a building dedicated to protecting worker rights? What next? A ham sandwich in a mosque?

Let’s remember we are a society of hypocrites. We will let kids have sex before they can vote.

You can’t get HIV by voting, even if you put your penis in the ballot box.

Tony Yengeni, the guy the ANC has appointed to teach ethics, was caught three times over the legal alcohol limit in Cape Town.

Then again, these days drunk driving could qualify you to be a judge, a health minister or an ANC spokesperson.

And the DA government is promising to spend R500 million fighting drug abuse, but it has no problem signing up a self-admitted ganja-smoking AbaThembu king.

If walking your talk was football, we’d be Bafana Bafana.

The trouble is that we externalise hypocrisy, not admitting our role.

The beneficiaries of apartheid often won’t admit that just because they didn’t order the pizza, it doesn’t mean they didn’t eat it.

And Marikana? How do you investigate atrocities against poor people in a commission that requires them to pay money to be involved?

»  @chestermissing is a political analyst puppet on LNN on eNCA

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