The humour of our politricks: More green than gold

2014-05-04 15:00

More green than gold

Just what exactly is Sports Minister Fikile Mbalula been smoking during the election campaign. Whatever it is, can this Mpimpi please have some.

First he came with the wild proposal that South Africa’s national teams should immediately implement a 60-40 ratio black-white ratio or else ...

Then he called opposition politicians witches and asked ANC supporters to find tokoloshes to chase them away. He went on television and gave a performance that must have had Chester Missing worried about his slot on Loyiso Gola’s Late Nite News.

This week he angered Kenyans by suggesting that their swimmers drown in Olympic pools.

We know that Mbalula, who opposed Jacob Zuma’s re-election at the Mangaung conference, is desperate to hang onto his government job after May 7.?But going to the extent of mimicking Zuma’s infamous Malawi comments is taking it a bit a far. Even for someone who is smoking strong stuff.

A word to the wise

Once upon a time Julius Malema and Buti Manamela were comrades-in-arms, fighting together to protect the Pastor of Nkandla from the long arm of the law.

No more. Malema now wants the Nkandla man behind bars while Manamela is the one who would most likely “kill for Zuma”.

When the Public Protector’s report on Nkandla came out Manamela was among the first to reject it, telling supporters that Thuli Madonsela “is not God”. When he was later appointed to the parliamentary committee probing the scandal he revealed that he had not read the report. This was more than two months after it came out.

His old comrade waded into him at the Durban University of Technology this week, telling students to take learning seriously and not be like Manamela.

“...You don’t behave like Buti Manamela has recently done, criticising Thuli Madonsela’s report. Then he gets appointed into a committee of Parliament which must review Thuli Madonsela’s report, then he says ‘Eish I didn’t read that report’, because you are going to be exposed,” Malema said.

Reports are for reading

Still on the baby communist, the Mpimpi was surprised to spot Manamela at an ANC march in Durban last weekend. Shouldn’t he have been reading the report he had not read? But things were clarified two days later when the ANC shut down Parliament’s Nkandla probe.

Clearly Manamela already knew on Saturday that he didn’t have to waste his time.

Insurgents will be teased

They really do not like Zanele Magwaza-Msibi down in Inkatha Freedom Party (IFP) land.

During his elections rallies IFP leader Mangosuthu Buthelezi and his supporters have spent chunks of time lambasting the National Freedom Party (NFP) leader, who broke away from the IFP three years ago.

IFP leaders believe that the NFP was set up by the ANC as a strategy to destroy their party. “The NFP is nothing but a “chama steshi” (pissing station) for the ANC,” one party leader told a rally.?Ouch!

Of fading stars

On the website of the Azanian People’s Organisation is an article penned by former president and erstwhile Science and Technology Minister Mosibudi Mangena.?In the article he talks about how the dreams of building a bright future for our children might be fading and that we might be descending towards a “failed state.”

Mangena has a point. But this Mpimpi thinks that given his party’s invisibility during the election campaign there is a much more immediate concern: A fading Azapo.

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