The joys of food foraging, mall-style

2012-09-11 11:37

As Andreas and I both work full-day, I recently came up with an ingenious way to spend more time together… grocery shopping on a Saturday morning.

I don’t like shopping for clothes or home stuff, but I quite enjoy shopping for food – feeling the avocados, smelling freshly baked bread – as long as you ignore everyone else in the aisles, what’s not to like?

Apparently, if you’re Dreas, there’s a lot not to like.

And most of it centres around being with me, as I engage in that most aggressive female activity … browsing.

“Stop touching everything,” he moaned just yesterday, as we made our way through our local supermarket.
“Why can’t you just write me up a list? Then I could take the list, buy the things on it and come straight home. I’ll even buy surprise doughnuts. Isn’t that what you corporate types call a win-win?”

“No,” I replied.

“Us corporate types are now all about sustainability and stuff. I am a gatherer, not a hunter, and definitely not a list-ticker. I want to see what’s in store and gather up organic, seasonal produce, working out meal plans on the fly in a pleasingly planet-saving way.

"All while arm-linked with my beloved. How can that not be fun for you?”

“It’s not fun for me.”

“Try harder.”

And so it has gone for the past few Saturdays, me chirpily piling up our trolley with both sensible and non-sensible provisions, prattling away, with Dreas acting as if he was pushing a cartful of dead babies.

“Exactly how is buying that bottle of truffle oil a blow for global sustainability?” he argued during yesterday’s shop.

“And your giant jar of Nutella?” I replied.

“It’s on my list.”

“So if I wrote down “20 jars of almond-stuffed olives” on a piece of paper, you’d buy them without a second thought?” I asked, incredulous.

“Well, you wouldn’t have written it down without giving it some thought,” he countered.

“So I’d assume you were having all your friends over for a Martini Marathon.”

And so it went, until a bottle of “let’s celebrate being us” Krone tipped Dreas over the edge.

“That’s it. If your consumerism gets any more whimsical, I may burst something important. Please, for the sake of our relationship, let me shop in peace.”

Fine. But I’m not telling you how to get that extra depth to your mushroom risotto.

» Sam works as Woolworths’ Digital Editor. Dreas is now grocery shopping online, on her own website, behind her back.

» Get your iMag with City Press on Sunday

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