Tips to finding love this Valentines Day

2010-02-10 12:11

Dating tips for over 40s

Sharon Van Doorene’s, counselling psychologist, tips for those who are over 40 and still thinking of dating:

  • Don’t be afraid to be alone for a time and reflect on what you

    have been through and what you can learn from your previous relationships.

  • Re-examine your individuality, your values, dreams and hopes and

    decide what you like about yourself and what you would like to change.

  • If you feel you are not worthy of finding someone who will treat

    you well or you have experienced repeated rejections or losses, it may be

    worthwhile to have some counselling before you embark on dating. These feelings

    are indicative of low self-esteem.

  • Engage in social activities that you enjoy. The chances are

    greater that you will meet someone compatible who shares similar interests.

    Doing things that you love ensures your life is not on hold waiting for someone

    to make you happy.

  • Clarify for yourself what your expectations are for the actual

    dating process and from your date. Discuss these ideas with your date (if it

    seems that it will develop into an ongoing relationship) and be open to your

    partner’s ideas. You may find that the other person has different expectations

    of what dating is than you do.

Asking someone out: how to get it right

According to Top Dating Tips Online, choosing the right moments is

half the battle in getting a date. But once that’s done, here are some tips to

help you through the other half of the battle.

  •  Understand when a woman has good reason to say no

  •  Don’t fight her excuses if she says no, just move on

  •  Choose a weeknight for the first date

  •  Be flexible and offer an alternative when asking - are you free

    Thursday or Friday?

  •  Always sound busy yourself

  •  Choose the right moment to approach a date in a bar of


  •  Try not to ask her out in the middle of a big group, choose your

    moment carefully for maximum effect

  •  Don’t ask her out when she is clearly busy or stressed or unhappy

    or not well

  •  Accept that some people you will meet at the wrong time

  •  Never be scared of asking, the more you ask the more confident

    you will be

  •  Don’t get annoyed if she says no - smile!

  •  Try and know as much about your date’s circumstances in advance

    only if she is known to you already

Flirting Tips Help You Show Interest

What would dating be without flirting? Flirting is fun, it signals

that we’re interested in someone and it initiates most successful relationships.

Many forms of flirting are simply outgrowths of the way you behave

when you meet someone you really like and are interested in having a romantic

relationship with.

However, some flirting is more subtle, making it hard to tell

whether you’re reading something that’s not there into an interaction simply

because you want the other person to flirt with you. So it’s useful to examine some of the key indicators of


Body Language

  •  Prolonged eye contact

  •  Dilated pupils

  •  Arched eyebrows

  •  Winking

  •  Rapid eye movement and blinking

  •  Stroking or toying with hair

  •  Smiling

  •  Licking of lips

  •  Touching the lips or teeth with tongue

  •  Thrusting chest or breasts outward

  •  Mirroring or copying posture

  •  Crossing legs

  •  Leaning inward

  •  Open-legged posture

Other Behaviour

  •  Any form of touching

  •  Playing with hands

  •  Fidgeting nervously

  •  Shy avoidance of eye contact

  •  Standing on one leg or shifting weight back and forth


  •  Laughter

  •  Whispering

  •  Personal questions, especially about relationship status

  •  Singling someone out in a group for conversation and


Being confident about your flirting is the best way to make sure it

is well-received. Nothing is sexier than confidence – nothing, that is, except

someone who knows how to flirt effectively. Now get out there and start


More dating tips on Top Dating Tips Online

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