My grandmother was called Makhulomhlophe (Grandmother with a Light Complexion). She had high cheekbones and traditional markings on her face - a black line from the top of her forehead, where her hair ended, to the tip of her nose, and black circles the size of a pencil end in the middle of each cheek. We seven grandchildren grew up in her house and she cared for us while our mother worked in the fields and our father, the eldest of her four children, was away working in the Welkom mines. She used to advise us on how to speak to boys when they proposed love. "You must trick them by saying something in English. She would imagine the conversation: Boy: "Sawubona ntombi emhlophe njengezihlabathi zolwandle (Hullo, beautiful girl)."