Jean Barker

Cruz: America’s least wanted

2016-04-29 10:09

Jean Barker

Everybody hates Ted Cruz, especially those who really know him intimately, like his college room mate at Princeton, successful screenwriter Craig Mazin.

In 2013, Mazin said this, on the brilliant Scriptnotes podcast, which is as off topic as it’s on point: “…Ted Cruz is a nightmare of a human being. I have plenty of problems with his politics, but truthfully his personality is so awful that 99 percent of why I hate him is just his personality. If he agreed with me on every issue, I would hate him only one percent less.”

Mazin (@clmazin) roasts him on Twitter to this day:  ‘Ted Cruz thinks people don't have a right to ‘stimulate their genitals.’ I was his college roommate. This would be a new belief of his.”

Oh, and this: “Getting emails blaming me for not smothering Ted Cruz in his sleep in 1988. What kind of monster do you think I am? A really prescient one?”

During a television interview with ABC’s This Week, he tells how girls would complain to him about his Cruz: “Can you please keep your roommate out of our hallway?”

Even Republicans Hate Ted

Even Lindsey Graham, long-time Republican and anti-gay-rights activist, who everybody is certain is gay himself, hates Ted Cruz too.

Lindsey said. “If you killed Ted Cruz on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was in the senate, nobody could convict you.” Appearing on The Daily Show with Trevor Noah, the senior senator from South Carolina and short-lived Republican presidential race straggler, officially endorsed Ted Cruz over Donald Trump, with this glowing review: “He was my 15th choice...what can I say?”

Stiffed by Boehner

Boehner, unlike Graham, actually prefers Trump to Cruz, referring to his “texting buddy” relationship with Trump. He called Cruz: “Lucifer in the flesh.” As @darth quipped on twitter: “any body else think that being Lucifer would actually be a step up” (sic).  Boehner’s hatred of Cruz is nothing new, as is, the hatred of practically anyone who ever knew the man. As far back as 2013, Beohner made himself known, calling Cruz a “Jackass”, and “a false prophet”.

False propheteering

Of course, like everybody, I have my own reason for disliking Ted Cruz.

I actually feel sorry for him – the unpopular guy with nobody to stick it in. He’s the guy everybody feels leaves slime wherever he crawls. We’ve all been there, or feared being there, and I hate bullying. But, what I personally don’t like about him is his obvious and total fakeness, and the fact that although this fakeness has been exposed, over and over, he’s still, inexplicably, in the running.

What bugs me most deeply in the fakeness stakes, is Cruz’s repeated, and untrue, assertion, that “Judeo-Christian Values” built America, and that made it great.

Firstly “Judeo-Christian” isn’t a thing. You can’t lump them together. Jews don’t even really do hell, that’s a Christian/Muslim thing. Secondly, the wrongdoing done in the name of religion – genocide of Native Americans, colonisation, slavery, and abuse of women – is a blight on America’s history, not something to be proud of!

What really makes America great is its secular laws and constitution, that allows for progress and change. The Founding Fathers may not have been perfect, and may have had stupid beards, but most of them were “deists”, which was what Atheists called themselves, back when they’d be burned at the stake for admitting they thought this God stuff didn’t belong in politics.

Cruz is obviously a liar

That’s why I don’t like him. The lies I have told in my life are the greatest sources of shame in my own story. I generally, now, live by the principal that if I want to lie about doing it, I probably shouldn’t do it in the first place.

Now, of course, most presidential candidates are liars. But Cruz is just so obviously a liar, that I’m amazed anyone believes him – even those creepy people with tiny noses and pink cheeks and recessed eyes in the Bible Belt.

The Daily Show found Cruz’s treasure trove of raw footage shot for his election campaign videos. In these out-takes, we see the painstaking failure of his attempts to prove that he’s a “genuine guy”. 

And boy oh boy, does he fail.

Jean earned an MFA in Directing and Screenwriting and works in the LA film industry. She tweets as @jeanbarker and blogs pictures of signs and more, here. She will be back.

Send your comments to Jean

: News24 encourages freedom of speech and the expression of diverse views. The views of columnists published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24.



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