Ask Sis Dolly: Should I stay?

By Drum Digital
19 February 2016

I’m 38 and the mother of my child is 30.

She’s HIV-positive and during her pregnancy we agreed that I would stick with her to support her.

Our child is now four. I’m still testing negative but now she says she doesn’t love me anymore and is cheating on me. Must I let her go? I love her.

Sis Dolly answers:

The story you tell about her HIV status gives me your context, but really has no bearing on the fact that she wants to leave you.

What it does say is that you might feel that she owes you because you made an agreement to support her.

The reality is that she doesn’t owe you anything but gratitude, as I’m sure she’s had a hard time coming to grips with her pregnancy and status.

Having said that, I do applaud you for your commitment to her and your child.

The truth is you can’t hold her back if she’s ready to move on.

You can’t make someone stay with you. You can try asking if there’s anything you could do together to improve the relationship.

If she says there’s nothing, I suggest you let her go, and find yourself a support network to help you live with the hurt.

Find Love!