Relationships: Dealing with a 'strange' mother-in-law

By Drum Digital
22 December 2013

Anonymous Asks:

I’ve been married for less than a year and I’m finding my mother-in-law very difficult. My husband says she wants him to be more honest with her. He makes things worse by not being assertive when she’s around and I’m sure she blames me when he does stand up for himself.

We’re still working out how to be husband and wife and this situation is complicating things. What can I do about it? Anonymous, Killarney

Sis Dolly Answers:

Be supportive of your husband.  That’s where you should start. Try not to take sides, as this isn’t your fight but his. His mother is obviously trying to come to terms with her son now being married and choosing another woman above her. I’m sure she’ll get used to it in time, but for now she’s testing him and trying to see if she still commands love, loyalty and respect.

Let them work it out. If you find it’s affecting your relationship with your husband, try to spend more time with his mother so that she doesn’t see you as an enemy but as a friend.  Let your husband spend some time with her on his own so that she doesn’t feel abandoned.

If this doesn’t work, I suggest you contact the Family and Marriage Society of SA (FAMSA) and go to counselling in your area (011-788-4784). Your marriage is still young and you need to get off to a good start.


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