HELP: "I enjoy bonking with both men and women"

By Faeza
22 August 2016

Anonymous from Pretoria writes:

I’m a 34-year-old man and I really can’t decide where I belong because I’ve been having intercourse with both men and women. I enjoy anal sex a lot but I feel that I need to be honest with myself. I’m not sure if I’m gay or bisexual.

Dr Eve answers:

Sexual preference is just one slice of the cake that makes up your entire sexual identity and

sexual orientation. Liking anal sex and enjoying sex with both men and women does not mean you are gay or bisexual or heterosexual.

Claiming your own sexual orientation requires you to acknowledge how you feel emotionally about people. Ask yourself these questions: who do you feel sexually attracted to; who do you wish to form a relationship with and which community do you wish to belong to.