HELP: "My girlfriend doe not want me to touch her private parts"

By Faeza
31 May 2017

Anonymous from Turffontein writes:

I’m a 24-year-old man and my girlfriend doesn’t want me to put my finger in her private part because she says it’s too sensitive. She also doesn’t want us to have oral sex. We only have two or three rounds a night then she says it’s enough. What’s the problem?

Dr Eve responds:

Your girlfriend has a right to refuse the kind of sex she does not want, and thank you

for respecting this. I well understand that the kind of sex she allows feels limiting to you

and you are dissatisfied. It sounds as if she is uncomfortable with her own genitals. Perhaps she has never explored her genitals alone. She is responding to you like a

woman who does not enjoy being sexual. Strike up a conversation about sexuality with her, with no criticism to her, but merely be

curious about her sexuality.