HELP: "My hubby paid lobola for another woman"

By Faeza
19 May 2017

Anonymous from Vaal:

I’m a 37-year-old mother of three. My husband has paid ilobolo for the mother of his other child. He never bothered to tell me about it. Now he wants me to understand. I can’t get over the pain. Please help.

Sis Naledi responds:

If you are still married and you were not consulted about this, you have a right to dispute

your husband taking another wife. Consult a legal expert who can advise you on what to do. Taking another wife is acceptable in other cultures, but it needs to be done in consultation with the first wife. Therefore, you cannot be expected to understand. If your opinion did matter to him, he should have done the right thing from the beginning.