How to cope when your man impregnates his side chick

By Faeza
21 April 2017

Anonymous from Kempton Park writes:

I’m a 28-year-old woman who has been in a relationship with the father of my son for six years. Our second baby is on the way. My problem is that he also impregnated another woman three years ago. I then forgave him. But the woman recently gave birth to her second child, whom I suspect is my boyfriend’s. When I ask my boyfriend about this, he says he is not sure if the baby is his. I don’t know if I should ask him to do a DNA test or believe that he is being honest with me. This is stressing me and it’s not healthy for the

baby. What must I do?

Move Expert responds:

Lorna Schofield, a psychologist under the Health Professions Council of South Africa (HPCSA) in East London, says, “It seems like a good time to assess whether this relationship is one in which you can realise your dreams. As humans, we do better in

relationships where we feel safe and emotionally supported. It may feel like your well-being rests on asking him whether the baby is his. The fact that he has not been open and honest with you is worrying. If he does not become aware of the consequences of his infidelity, there is a high chance the cheating will continue and if it does, you are better off out of the relationship. I also recommend counselling for the both of you.”