The return of the ex part 2

By admin
20 November 2013

Khanyi Nkala wrote to Move! “I am 29-year-old lady of Denver and I recently went back to my love from the past. We had a date and he reminded me of how I used to treat him. I didn’t appreciate him, I used to shout at him for no reason and did not respect him. Is it a good idea to get back together, and how do I prepare for a successful relationship with an old lover?”

Is it all her fault that the relationship failed?

The reasons for a failure in a relationship are often shared. It is important that you talk to your ex and find out what he thinks was his role in the failure of your relationship. Allowing you to be disrespectful to him is one reason.  Find out what he thinks was your role in the break-up of your relationship, what went wrong from his point of view and why he wants to get back with you.

This process may be an emotionally challenging exercise, because it has the potential to bring up issues that you may not be ready or prepared to deal with.  If you experience some difficulty, you or your partner may want to seek help from a relationship counsellor. It may also benefit you to read about relationships in books and magazines. This may explain to you the different styles of relating between men and women and how these play themselves out in a relationship. It may also help to use these differences to strengthen your relationship.