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What do women really want in bed?

By Faeza
24 March 2017

SIZE matters when it comes to sex. This seems to be the popular perception. We often see it and read about it. For example, “There are a number of issues that lead to this topic being the talk of town, which includes professional pornography, where it’s rare to see movies that are showing relatively smaller manhoods. This leads to the perception

that bigger is better,” explains sexologist, Dr Babalwa Funda kaMabhoza. In popular culture, the only size that matters is big: it’s celebrated in songs, and men who are

considered sexy allude to their size being big. On the other hand, small-sized manhood is mocked. But does size really matter? Is it possible to be sexually satisfied with one that’s too small or too big, and should you come upon one’s that massive or tiny, how should navigate it?


“I used to think that there is no such thing as a manhood that is too big. After all, I’m one of those people who really believe that size matters, so the bigger the better,” says Boitumelo Lediga*. “That’s until I met Jerome* and his oversized male member. Let’s just say I now believe some sizes are so big, it looks like a weapon of mass destruction.”

She says some of the challenges she experienced was finding the right size condom and discovering that no matter how lubricated she was, it was hard to get into action. “I was always aware of how big it was and sort of had to take a moment during sex to get ready

for it. It was not painful, but it was also not a pleasure.”

As Christina Wellor, an American sex columnist, writes, “It’s a cliché that bigger is always better. While a reasonably sized manhood will provide more friction and a fuller, more

satisfying sensation; one that is too big can be uncomfortable. If the cervix takes too much of a bashing it can hurt.”

Here's what you can do to be comfortable:

Position 1: He lies on the bed while you climb on top of him. This will control the depth of the penetration.

Position 2: He lies down, you squat on top and face

away from him so he has a view of your back. This

controls angle and depth of penetration.


At the opposite end of the size scale is a male member that’s too small. “When I encountered one like that, I had to ask myself if it’s true that when it comes to size, it’s

about how he uses it that matters more,” says Boitumelo.

According to sex experts, there is some truth in what Boitumelo says about technique being more important than size. After all, more women need clitoral stimulation

instead of just penetration alone to reach an orgasm.

The following positions will work best:

Position 1: Doggy style, which increases the pressure.

Position 2: Lie on your back and put one leg over his shoulder. He must sit across your thigh and straddle you.