What’s my name Muntuza, Bae, Ekse Joe

2015-10-01 06:00
laughing with
lunga adam

laughing with lunga adam

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I cannot claim to know what sweet name or term you use to refer to that special somebody of yours, but I do know that terms of endearment are aplenty in Visionland.

Also, before you jump for joy, I must inform you that I know of a lot of chaps out there who call their partners with all sorts of tender names, not just because a strong feeling is the motivating factor, but due to the fact they have long forgotten their names! It happens.

The nerves that accompany the sometimes-excruciating task of proposing to a chick means that at times a sorry case of amnesia will play itself out even as the name was told to you.

Then, how else are you able to conjure up the confidence to ask ‘the love of your life’ her name, weeks or even months into the relationship?

But, the fact remains that whoever came up with the idea of extra affectionate names for our muntuzas was a genius of sorts. Mind you, these names are open to different interpretations. Experience has taught me so. Take ‘thambo lam le kentucky’, for instance. This expression must mean someone very dear to the besotted, because we blacks love our Kentucky Fried Chicken. Fact is, many a grown man is to be seen at these fast food outlets, munching away piece of chicken bone. In most cases, the madala only lets go of his piece of isjejana, once he feels done crunching the thigh or whichever part bone to smithereens.

So, then, what’s the term to mean: something one holds on to no matter what, even when it’s best to let go of it? Or just something that one chooses not to do without, as in the case of us darkies and their meat? ‘Baby’ is probably the most over-used of these. Even in a state of anger, one tends to find the word useful. “Hayibo baby kutheni ungagqithanga e chemist ngeza pilisi zam?” Or even: “Baby, why are you cheating on me?”, even as this is accompanied by some profane words.

I’m no romantic at all. That should explain my intrigue at this harmless name-calling business. I prefer to call people by their names. Full names. If your name is Nonkosindiphile and you are my girlfriend, then that’s how I’m referring to you. All the time. Every time. Any time. After all, it’s your name, isn’t it?

In this age of the born-frees, we have witnessed an addition to the vocabulary of the besotted: the word ‘Bae’.

Imagine my concealed mirth when somebody in the know about these things unravelled the mystery: That it is used in reference to a significant other. A shortened version of Babe. I would like to know where it came from, or did someone decide to dislodge the other ‘b’ from ‘babe’. Wouldn’t put it past our people, in these ever-changing times. All said and done, there is no word that gets my spleen than the ubiquitous “Joe”. Ekse Joe, whoever came up with this, deserve nine bullets on their toes. S’true, Joe

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