Meeting the Boss

2017-05-23 06:00

On Tuesday 16 May I went to the gym as usual. Maybe it was 10:00 or so.

As I pulled in to park there were two white BMWs parked right at the front entrance. Not so unusual. What was unusual were the two rather obvious bodyguards “minding” the car. Dark suits, white shirts, dark ties, sunglasses. Something like a bad CSI Miami episode.

They were drawing a lot of attention. As I approached the entrance one of them casually but not so casually moved his hand under his jacket and around to the back of his trouser belt. His eyes fixed on mine. A rather sad attempt at “Look, I might have a gun.”

I giggled and walked by.

For a moment I thought someone was filming a bad movie.

When I entered the change room one guy was wrapping himself in a bulletproof vest. Rather rushed and still wet. He seemed to be having trouble with his earpiece so his plain-clothed buddy had to help him connect the ear to the radio in his back belt.

What I presume was the boss then spoke up: “Are you ready.” He was two lockers away from me. Looked like a young Putin. Maybe 38, blonde, blue eyes. The accent sounded eastern European but he spoke very fast. He was fully dressed but his hair still wet. Vest Guy said “Yes”, although he clearly was not ready at all. Plain Clothes snapped to attention. Boss was rather impatient but looked at me in a very vacant way. Kinda like he knew how silly this all was.

“We will see you there,” he snapped at Mr Vest who was still struggling with his toys. The Boss grabbed his backpack and jacket and left. Poor Mr Vest ran after, still half-dressed.

I have no idea who this chap was but I’d like to give him some advice. Next time you want to come to the gym, just come. Park like everyone else. Leave the goons in the coffee shop. No-one knows who you are and here in the valley, no-one cares.

Antony Hyde Fish Hoek

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