You just have to love our Rainbow City

2018-05-15 06:01

The Mother City: Cape Town, South Africa; the Rainbow Nation – indeed a glorious democracy we are privileged to inhabit.

A young democracy, yes, experiencing teething problems like any normal youngster. Rioting, strikes, looting, xenophobia, corruption and unemployment are but a few of the issues troubling this youngster.

But let us set aside these negatives for a minute and contemplate the many issues which make our shores such a treasure trove of positivity for certain professionals. Issues like the true identity of the executive mayor of Cape Town, the proposed taxation of alternative energy sources, a TV licence for your smartphone and yes, tariff increases for water savers.

Positives? For whom? Why, the very many stand-up comedians, of course. Certainly not for me. I’m unquestionably unfunny. But where else is comedic material of such quality available?

The executive mayor has been recalled. Or maybe not. The deputy mayor is in charge. Or is he? The provincial leader of the party concerned allegedly has no idea of the current status of this position. Really? A comedy of errors, you say?

The gravy train needs to continue running but needs new sauce. Ah yes, how about taxing the electrical energy savers? Owners of generators or solar installations may soon be required to pay for this. Spending thousands of hard-earned rands on reducing your carbon footprint will now cost you.

A proposed TV licence for your smartphone or computer? The relevant state owned enterprise has been run into the ground and needs to generate new income since only a fraction of the millions of households pay their annual licence fees. The gravy train needs this passenger and our fees. “Pay your TV licence. It’s the right thing to do.” Time for a new slogan, methinks.

Rainwater harvesting, grey water users, water warriors. The highest percentage increase, 55%, is proposed for those using the least water. Save and the City will punish you. Material good enough for any stand-up, I say.

South Africa? You’ve got to love her. If not, would the last one to leave please switch off the lights.

Maghmood Allie Plumstead

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