Thin spread of April fool jokes

2015-04-01 12:37

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Cape Town - Steve Hofmeyr, Eskom and President Jacob Zuma were the favourites in a sparse selection of April Fool jokes in South Africa's media on Wednesday.

IOLscitech warned of "Loadshedding stage 3G" with a complicated explainer on how the power usually drained by smartphones had to be reduced to keep cellphone masts online.

A source in fake Eskom said the "inconvenience to users unable to use Facebook or WhatApp during Stage 3G load shedding will be minor.

A spokesperson for the cellphone industry, Tony Ring, did not want to comment and fake Eskom's spokesperson Jan Draadloos (Jan Wireless) said he would comment later.

The Witness reported that Eskom, backed by the health department would push for emergency legislation to force everybody over the age of 8 to cycle for a minimum of 30 minutes to help save the power utility.

Every household would have to buy a PowerUp stationary bicycle which would convert mechanical energy into electrical current via an inverter.

The unfit may start with five minutes a day, and people would be allowed to bank extra time for when they go on holiday, for example.

Making fools of Hofmeyr and Zuma

Beeld reported that President Jacob Zuma had had a long hard think and finally decided that the right thing to do would be to pay back the money spent on non-security upgrades at his home in Nkandla.

"His excellency, Pres. Jacob G. Zuma, gave the matter a lot of thought and came to the conclusion that it would be in the best interests of the country to pay back all the money," a spokesperson said.

The opposition was reportedly caught unawares, forcing the Economic Freedom Fighters (EFF) to hastily change the well-known Twitter hashtag #paybackthemoney to #paidbackthemoney.

Zuma's spokesperson said the president was on his way to the Post Office this morning (Wednesday) to put the cheque in the mail, according to reporter Ian April.

The Daily Maverick got the scoop "that singer Steve Hofmeyr "may join the EFF as a senior strategist".

It noted that "the king of the boerewors curtain's musical hearts, Steve would bring a uniquely discordant tone to the EFF's party tune".

Hofmeyr's new party communications officer, Chestington Missinga, said Hofmeyr's first order of business would be "to expel all puppets from the party, both political and actual".

Hofmeyr and ventriloquist and satirist Conrad Koch and his puppet Chester Missing traded verbal blows on Twitter over Hofmeyr's tweet saying that in his view black people were the “architects of apartheid".

But for most publications, it was business as usual, with no nod to the annual prankster's tradition.

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