Marikana - Life has dealt many Lonmin miners a heavy blow since August 2012, when 34 of them were killed by police. Lonmin miner Zanovuyo Gobityala, who has worked in the mine for eight years, said his life was worse than before his fellow miners were shot down. "We are living in squalor. The risk I take with my life everyday underground makes me want to cry. I am prepared to die for the little I can give my family."Gobityala said he remembered clearly the days that led to the deaths of so many miners he had known personally. "Some of us still struggle to sleep, thinking about our brothers. I don't want to talk about this because I am going to cry," he told News24. Meanwhile, Dambile Dyasi, who came looking for a job at Lonmin three years ago, said he would be grateful for any income from the mine. "I have children that are looking at me for food. I came here to find work because I don't have an education. There is nothing else I can do but dig for gold." Dyasi said he has been living in hope that someday the mine would employ him permanently. He added that the hardships and the brutal killing of the miners four years ago would not deter him from being a mineworker.Commemoration The Association of Mineworkers and Construction Union (Amcu) is commemorating the Marikana massacre on Tuesday. On August 16, 2012, police shot and killed 34 miners, apparently while trying to disperse them and end a strike. Ten people, including two police officers and two Lonmin security guards, were killed in the preceding week.The Farlam Commission of Inquiry was instituted to investigate the incident and the circumstances around it. It recommended that there be a probe into suspended National Police Commissioner Riah Phiyega's fitness to hold office.