Believing in sexual destiny is ruining relationships

Sexual destiny is the idea that if two people are soulmates, sexual satisfaction will automatically be present. However, researchers in Canada have found this attitude is actually wrecking romances as people are failing to work on their relationships, preferring instead to just walk away.

Ph.D. candidate Jessica Maxwell from the University of Toronto teamed up with researchers at Dalhousie University and conducted six studies to determine the factors that impact a couple’s relationship and sexual satisfaction.

Speaking to 1,900 participants, all who were at different stages in their relationships, the couples were asked a series of questions. Some of the group believed in sexual destiny while others related more to sexual growth, the idea that satisfaction in the bedroom takes time and effort.

It was found that those who believed in sexual growth had a better connection during sex, higher sexual satisfaction with their partner and a better relationship overall.

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On the other hand, sexual destiny subscribers had lower sexual and relationship happiness. Authors noted they also may experience added pressure in the bedroom as they believe sexual performance plays a key role in determining the success of a relationship.

“People who believe in sexual destiny are using their sex life as a barometer for how well their relationship is doing, and they believe problems in the bedroom equal problems in the relationship as a whole,” Jessica stated.

“Whereas people who believe in sexual growth not only believe they can work on their sexual problems, but they are not letting it affect their relationship satisfaction.”

The study has been published in APA PsycNet.

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