“I have been married for 15 years. My life was very happy until 10 years ago, when my husband cheated and had an affair with a grandmother of 55 years. He lies to me and is very abusive. When I ask him to help around the house, he refuses and says I must find a man who will be willing to help me. This breaks my heart because I am very faithful to him. Please advise me what to do because he keeps speaking about divorce.” – Desperate, Port Elizabeth
I am sorry to hear about this because you don’t deserve this treatment. His behaviour is typical of some men when they have found new lovers. Once men start dating other women, it often becomes an ongoing thing. I don’t think this is serious, not after so many years of marriage. I think this is a short-term problem that will disappear in time. In the meantime, why should you be subjected to this kind of a behaviour? I suggest you give him the space that he wants. Move on with your life and when he realises his mistakes and you don’t accept him back, he will probably beg for forgiveness. Make new friends and have fun. Make sure that you are at your best at all times and be a responsible mother.