We always fight


“I am from a family of six children, three sisters and three brothers. My main problem is that we always fight. Sometimes it is me against my elder brother or me against my younger sister. There is never peace at home.

Sometimes when I look back to try to find out what is the cause of our problems, I don’t get answers. We often fight about food or small problems. I have built myself a flat outside our home to be able to avoid these conflicts, but this has not helped. It is not easy living under these conditions. What can I do to have peace at home again?” – Simthandile, East London

Dear Simthandile

Fighting among brothers and sisters is common, although if it has become an everyday issue, I don’t think it is fine. You need to respect one another as brothers and sisters, because if you don’t, you will always get involved in fights.  It sounds as if you lack respect for one another. Respect is the foundation of love and honesty, and if you have it, you will never go wrong.

I suggest that you involve your parents or a relative you all respect, sit down and talk your hearts out. The only way to find out what causes these fights is to talk about the issues as honestly as possible. If this doesn’t work, you can approach social workers in your neighbourhood, since the cause might be deeper than you think, and it might require counselling. I suggest you attend to this matter as soon as possible, because such fights often end up being very bad, and we read about similar matters every day in the media. I hope this works out and I wish you all the luck in resolving this matter.

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