‘My cheating ex has returned to tell me she’s pregnant – should I believe her?’

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Photo: Getty Images/Gallo Images
Photo: Getty Images/Gallo Images

Question

My girlfriend cheated on me and now she’s been back in touch to tell me she’s pregnant. She says it’s my baby, but how does she know that? Isn’t it ironic that she cheated on me and now wants to claim I’m the father of her child? What must I do?

Answer

She might’ve thought the grass was greener on the other side, only to realise after she’d left you that it isn’t. She says the baby is yours and while your doubt about this is understandable there is a possibility that it is yours. You need to ensure you don’t make the wrong decision by simply denying what she’s saying without having any proof. If she had unprotected sex with both you and the other man there’s a 50/50 chance that you fathered the child. She says she’s sure the child is yours, but you have every right to insist on a paternity test. Tell her you need to know for sure if the child is yours before you make any decisions. You only have an obligation towards the child if you know for sure you’re the father. If you’re not the father yet you’re still willing to be in a relationship with her, you’ll have to discuss in advance how that would work. If you decide to get back together, it would benefit both of you to seek the assistance of a relationship counsellor so you can sort this out and move on.

According to the South African Government website, An individual, lawyer or a magistrate may apply for a paternity test with the National Health Laboratory Service where one’s blood group will be analysed to determine whether they are related to someone else.

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