The dating game changes with each era, and some rules of the game can be quite controversial, one such trend is the girlfriend allowance.
The girlfriend allowance can be simply defined as a sum of money a man pays to his girlfriend, for her to take care of her monthly expenses.
Speaking to Drum *Sandile and *Zinhle – a couple who believes in the girlfriend allowance are speaking out about what it means for their relationship.
The couple met on Twitter seven years ago and became friends, but after being friends for two years they’d been there for each other for many life experiences and ended up falling in love.
“To be honest, I fell in love with her the very first time I met her. After messaging each other for some time, we decided to attend a show we both were interested in – it was like we had known each other for the longest time. But I didn’t reveal my feeling for her because I wanted us to form a friendship first,” Sandile opens up.
“You know, we should actually listen to women when they say we should embrace the friendzone. If you play your cards right, she’ll end up seeing that you’re actually perfect for her,” he laughs.
A blushing Zinhle tells us she wasn’t very hopeful when she met Sandile because he seemed like the “typical Twitter guy”, but when she got to know him, she fell in love and never looked back.
“He was the regular handsome Twitter guy, tall, lots of followers and girls gasping for air whenever he’d tweet the simplest things. Like, he’d tweet ‘morning’ and girls would be ready to throw their bras at him, so I wasn’t planning on pursuing anything other than a friendship with him. But he worked really hard to win me over, and he did,” she says.
The two are still on Twitter, and with growing trends, their relationship has also evolved. Sandile budgets a portion of his salary for his girlfriend every month, and says he was the one who initiated it.
“I saw a guy on Twitter sharing how he puts money aside to give his woman’s girlfriend allowance and I found that very cool, he explained his reasons and I got him. It’s not trying to buy her affection or showing who ‘wears the pants’, it’s just about showing your woman appreciation and seeing her do things she loves doing. In fact, she earns way more than I do, but that’s not a factor because I want to do it. Even though I know she’d never accept it, if I don’t give her money, another man will always be willing to,” he tells us.
Zinhle explains that se was wasn’t comfortable with the idea at first.
“At first he just sent the money to my account and said ‘go spoil yourself’. I was raised by an independent single mom, so that whole gesture was insulting to me, I almost broke up with him. But like I said, this one’s a very hardworking man, so he worked hard at explaining himself and I understood and ended up enjoying it guiltfree. I don’t always expect it, because I still don’t believe I’m entitled to it, but it’s still so sweet,” *Zinhle shares.
When his girlfriend gets up to go to the bathroom, Sandile gushes and boasts about how responsible his girlfriend is. “You know she uses that money to either take my mother out for a spa day or saves it? She has a savings account for rainy days for us, see why I’m so in love with her?”
Even though some have labelled girlfriend allowance a form of prostitution, this young couple says it’s relative, and everyone can do it in a way that works for them.
*Real names were not used at the couple’s request.