Another Joost lover confesses

2009-11-03 22:30

Johannesburg - Former Springbok captain Joost van der Westhuizen cheated on his wife, Amor Vittone, with former Springbok athlete Charmaine Weavers (Gale), it was revealed on Tuesday.

This came to light after Van der Westhuizen said as recently as Sunday that his contact with the young woman in the infamous sex video was "the first and only time" he was unfaithful to Vittone and denied that he had a relationship with Weavers.

Weavers, 46, said on Tuesday she is glad Van der Westhuizen has now openly admitted he was the man in the sex video.

"It's just such a pity that his confession was so selective, instead of rather confessing to everything.

"Today is the first time I am speaking in public in my own name about my relationship with Joost. I believe the things must come out so that the book of the past can be closed for everyone concerned," Weavers said.

She spoke about her connection with Van Der Westhuizen earlier this year in an interview with Huisgenoot/You without her identity being revealed at the time. In that article she said she and Joost had sex even while Vittone was pregnant.

Plea for forgiveness

When Beeld approached Van der Westhuizen about Weavers' claim on Tuesday, he said: "There were many sins and I did many wrong things. My plea for forgiveness in my book reaches wider than just the video; it includes my general past.

"From now on I just want to walk the straight and narrow (path) and do things right. Charmaine Gale, Mike Bolhuis (Van der Westhuizen's private investigator) and anyone else is free to reveal whatever they want to.

"I confess my sins and I apologise, I ask for forgiveness, and that is that."

Weavers represented South Africa at the 1992 Olympic Games. At the time she was described as one of the most attractive women in world athletics.

She said on Tuesday that her affair with Van der Westhuizen started while he was still married to his first wife, Marlene, whom he divorced in 2001, shortly before marrying Vittone.

Amor: There is anger and disappointment

Meanwhile, Vittone told a radio interviewer on Monday her heart has been "ripped out".

"There is anger and terrible disappointment in my heart. If everything had come out in the beginning [that it was Van der Westhuizen in the video] it would have been much better."

Speaking to DJ Darren Scott on his Gauteng breakfast show, Amor said she asked Van der Westhuizen every day for eight months, "Joost are you sure it isn't you in the video?"

Vittone said her husband entangled himself in a "web of lies".

"He thought he could get out of the situation."

Vittone said that the night Joost confessed to her while she was cooking, she just looked at him.

"I didn't speak to him for three days. I wasn't a mother for those three days. I don't know where I was. It was the loneliest time of my life. My parents were in Canada and the man I'm married to, wasn't there."

More bad news

Vittone said that soon after the video saga erupted, doctors found that their little boy, five-year-old Jordan, has only 20% hearing in one ear and 40% in the other.

"It was even worse for me [than the video saga]. Why this as well?"

The singer says she began to see the danger lights when she, Joost and her parents received threats several times over the past three years. She believes the same people that threatened them, were selling the sex video.

Vittone says it is "so untrue" that her parents asked her to divorce Joost.

She also said although she thinks they should perhaps spend time apart, it isn't true that she asked him to move out.

"I feel I was let down, but I am sorry for him. I still do love him. I am physically and mentally tired.

"I honestly don’t know whether everything will be 100% OK again, but I am prepared to give 110%. There is still a lot to be thankful for. Life is so short."

  • preshen govender - 2009-11-04 09:18

    Did you hear about Joost's new show: "Boobs and all"

  • preshen govender - 2009-11-04 09:19

    Joost should be the new Bafana Banfana Coach he love to get his Vuvuleza blown

  • Amanda - 2009-11-04 09:21

    I am really sorry for Amor,(I have been in her shoes) but ever since her marriage to Joost they both thought (especially Amor) that they were better and above everyone else. How the mighty have fallen.

  • tessa - 2009-11-04 09:21

    Thinking of you and the kids Amore. You will always be a beautiful person, a stunning mom and I believe, a wonderful wife. We don't always know why these happen but remember this: "Never will I leave you, Never will I forsake you" Hebrews 13:5

  • JUSTDESERTS - 2009-11-04 09:23

    What goes around - comes around!!!! You Amor was the reason that your husband divorced his first wife, and you thought that you would change him once you married him???!!! What you did to his wife has now turned and bitten you in the backside, but only harder!!! TO ALL THE WOMEN WHO TAKE MARRIED MEN AWAY FROM THEIR WIVES

  • annette - 2009-11-04 09:23

    Charmaine you are a cheap sensationalist. Leave Joost alone and stop having sex with married men

  • Dawn De Canha - 2009-11-04 09:26

    Amor, what are you still doing with that man. He will never stop doing what he has done and if he reallyt loved you he would never had done it in the first place. There is absolutely no excuse for any man ever doing that to a women he made a pledge to in front of God.

  • Julie - 2009-11-04 09:27

    Amor.. I wish you strenght. It can not have been an easy time for you. They say time heals things - but learning to trust again is harder than forgiveness. I really admire the way you have handles yourself through out this and being in the public eye can not be easy. Good luck and God Speed

  • Johan - 2009-11-04 09:27

    Let's leave them alone to get on with their lives....

  • Joost - 2009-11-04 09:30

    Help I am sinking. Please help me.

  • MustardMan - 2009-11-04 09:32

    Does the idiot really think just by apologizing and confessing in a BOOK that it will make everything ok? And to cheat on Amor while she was pregnant is just the pits!! The scumbag deserves to be alone and miserable the rest of his life and Amor shouldn't take him back, the prick!

  • cy - 2009-11-04 09:34

    Typical media bias "More Bad News" to make a good headline. The quotes from Amor as interviewed on Jacaranda are so selective that they create an impression that things are bad between them now. Amor said these things came out in August and she has since dealt with this but the report suggests that things are not all right now.

  • MARLENE BAIKIE - 2009-11-04 09:41

    For heavens sake leave them alone. It is about time we S A grow up, I think it is their private lives. I think Amor & Jooste should not have gone and spilt their private lives on the radio.

  • Shandy - 2009-11-04 09:48

    To all the people in this answer collumn who are being judgmental and critical of this couple, shame on you, pull the log out of your own eye before you point at the twig in another persons eye. Just because they are celebrities doesn't make them exempt from the possibility of making terrible mistakes in their lives. They are human after all and thousands of marriages around this country have been through the same thing. Give them a break , so they have made mistakes, its their lives that are effected not yours so climb off your self righteous horses and and get real!

  • Lady B - 2009-11-04 09:48

    Nobody but God can judge Joost & Amor ... what they are going through right now has happened to countless couples ... just a pity their private lives are being splashed all over the place ... My prayers and best wishes are with them .. not because of who they are but because of one of the greatest things we are called to do in this life is FORGIVE (over & over again). I just hope they will hold on.

  • amanda - 2009-11-04 09:49

    Joost get therapy for your sex addiction. Charmaine Gail, get a life because you don't have one! Amor you are in my thoughts and I will pray for you and your little ones. Keep your head up and remember you don't owe anybody anything and look the world in the eye!

  • WhatYouSowYouReap - 2009-11-04 09:51

    I do not feel sorry for Amor at all! She was committing adultery with him while he was still married to Marlene - she's getting what she deserves. The ones I do feel sorry for, are those two kids who have such losers as parents.

  • LuLuBug - 2009-11-04 09:54

    Ok, shoot me! I am a boere meisie but will NEVER trust an Afrikaans man!! I think it has to do with the way we Afrikaners bring boys up. They are always treated as extra special individuals. Have you noticed how they like wearing the pants and like keeping women under there thumb?

  • Denise - 2009-11-04 09:57

    Must say all you judgemental people: He who has not sinned cast the first stone. Leave Amor and Joost alone to get on with their lives. Amor the WILL OF GOD WILL NEVER TAKE YOU WHERE THE GRACE OF GOD WILL NOT PROTECT YOU!

  • Kim - 2009-11-04 10:01

    Thats it Amanda. The High & Mighty Joost & Amor, how they have fallen. No women should go through the pain of finding out your husband is cheating on you. He has serious issues but I cannot understand how Amor would even want to think about staying in a relationship with a crazy sex maniac and drug addict. Love is blind I guess... What a shame..

  • Niky - 2009-11-04 10:04

    Why on Earth that whole fiasco should be news?!?I've heard they were both running around only he got caught. I have no sympathy for either of them.Amor should remember what she did to his first wife and hopefully appologise to her, well overdue.

  • PETERE - 2009-11-04 10:04

    Unfortunately many couples go through serious relationship dramas that end up one way or the other. Outsiders do not know all the facts and should refrain from interfering or expressing ill informed opinions. It is sad that Amor and Joost's issues are now in the public domain and spotlight. I know that it was Joost's choice now to do that (maybe to boost his book sales,) but for Amor's benefit it would be best if people backed off and let them address their issues together without public comment.

  • Anon - 2009-11-04 10:04

    Leave them alone. Everybody makes mistakes in life. Just because one is a celeb. does not make it any different.
    They have enough problems without everyones malicious comments. Most of these comments are by others that are just as bad if not worse.

  • Lani - 2009-11-04 10:15

    Charmaine, you really should be asking for forgiveness instead of making your lover the only culprit. The man was not only married, his wife was pregnant and you knew it. I hope you are not expecting any sympathy from the public, because you won't get any.

  • DK - 2009-11-04 10:17

    I can imagine what this poor woman is going through, this must be one of the worst things that a man or a woman can do to their partner. These things have a way of revealing themselves when least expected, no sin will ever be hidden forever.

    God will still forgive him if he really repents and changes his ways, with God everything and anything is possible. There is still hope for that marriage with God's help.

  • Chantal - 2009-11-04 10:17

    "Life is too short", well said Amor. It takes a very strong women to put up with all that she's been through and still am prepared to stand by her man and give him a nother chance. Hillary Clinton suffered the same fate and proved to the world that she is strong, sound minded and has an unconditional love for her family. She and her family worked through their difficult, publically exposed problems and came out victorious. We must leave space in our lives for reconciliation in every relationship or all that we've been striving for is well in vain. None of us are perfect beings, everyone has some skeleton in the closet, the only difference is that some are caught out and others aren't. For those who remain undiscovered, their lives will always be dark and stale and they constantly feel like they need to watch their backs. Their luggage becomes such a burden, putting strain on their relationships and always having a bounded spirit. Those who get caught are crucified for a while, but at least they confess and come clean, giving them another chance to start fresh. Working toward redemption and re-acceptance into society is hard work but in the end it is all worth it. Amor and her family have suffered enough, they now need to be left alone so that they can work through this and find that spiritual niche going forward. I truly believe that Amor and Jooste can find true love again once they have accepted the things that they cannot change, and made peace with it. The bible says, "He who conceals his sins and transgressions will not be successful but he who confesses his sins will be forgiven and fruitful. Joost's confession shows that he still cares about what people think of him as a person and he first and foremost a human being before he is a man. Many people are reading too much into his confession and they are being too analytical. People may have become too opinionated but what we must remember is, that people will forgive you for what you've done, but people will not forgive you for not caring.

  • Len - 2009-11-04 10:19

    Joost thanks for the many years of great rugby entertainment. So you made a mistake. Hands up anyone who hasnt. I hope you, Amor and you children have a great life together as a family and be blessed.

  • Al - 2009-11-04 10:20

    If reported accurately, Joost's words "... I ask for forgiveness, and that's that" still indicates that he is arrogant. Joost, I have been there, your attitude is wrong. You need to step back change into a new set of clothes and become a humble father, husband, friend, citizen. Humble.

  • wayne - 2009-11-04 10:24

    We South Africans appear to relish the circumstances that the amor joost affair is and has generated.we really do enjoy it. One chirp springs 2 mind'how the mighty have fallen'. Don't quite understand that one.They are celebrities and we put them on the pedestal. Clearly his admission of his affair indicates that he was wrong, but why do we have to get involved. The pain that this family is going thru is just been piled on by us, the public. Let's leave them alone and concentrate on the more humorous aspects of South African life, like the chap with the "foot in the mouth" disease, Julius Malema.

  • Jan - 2009-11-04 10:27

    This behaviour is not what a high profile rugby star should be doing. He should be the ROLE MODEL for the young rugby players of this country.

  • jo - 2009-11-04 10:28

    Anon - everybody makes mistakes but to keep on lying about it?! Joost was booted by Super Sport and decided to write a book and is eager to reveal the truth now, to make money out of us? Please boycott the book.

  • sonja - 2009-11-04 10:28

    what Joost does or doesn't do has nothing to do with the public. honestly,people must start to live their own lives and stop feeding off other people's misery.

  • Anon - 2009-11-04 10:30

    He got caught in his own web of lies and now writes a book which he expects will make everything right. What would've happened if he never got was all about himself and his ego.

  • as i see it - 2009-11-04 10:32

    I suppose "the devil made me do it"

  • Curious - 2009-11-04 10:33

    Joost has a long history of disloyality. While married to his first wife, he had a girlfriend in each major town in South Africa. It is really interesting that he is confessing to the Video Tape, but says nothing about the rest of his life. If he tells the whole truth, and gets some help, then maybe one can start giving him some slack!

  • Reeva - 2009-11-04 10:34

    Hang in there girl. You're strong and will be able to overcome this!!!! It takes time but you will smile again one day.

  • Pete - 2009-11-04 10:35

    Tto all those that are welding the axe towards Joost I really hope that your past is clean and no hidden skeletons. Let them be and for them to sort out there own problems. In S A we tend to always condem others first look in the mirror.

  • Bonny - 2009-11-04 10:35

    Joost must be smiling all the way to the bank..his book is a sellout with all this publicity. Amor must walk around with blinkers on to not have seen any of this long ago.. dearie me..must be wonderful to be so naive..

  • Ken - 2009-11-04 10:38

    Joost and Amor chose to go public so they must face the public's opinion. Maybe they thrive on this, anyway Joost who has never been one of my rugby favourites is a down right prick and Amor must wake up!! or maybe she is too blame for his behaviour??

  • Mickey - 2009-11-04 10:39

    He is not the first celeb to cheat and he won't be the last. Most of the public knew it was him in the video. Why he had to deny it - Only he knows. Why buy a book about all his "so sorry" - And as for the ladies that had sex with a married man - Hope you making money selling yourself - or should I say making yourself even more of a wh... - Did you add another notch to your belt - Having sex with another celeb??

  • Just a thought - 2009-11-04 10:41

    The only difference between them and the general public is that the details of their private lives are played out on a very public platform. We all make mistakes, we all have lied at one point, we all deserve forgiveness when we're ready for it. Joost has done what hundreds of men have done but the average man doesn't lose his job over it. He has to take the consequences of his actions, he is a public figure after all, but I choose not to criticise or judge as I am not perfect and am not a saint (regardless of whether you or I have done what he has done, we're still imperfect in other areas).

  • @LuluBug - 2009-11-04 10:43

    Remember not all Afrikaans men are like that you do get the decent 1's to

  • Nicole - 2009-11-04 10:43

    Sleeping with someone (or multiple poeple) other than your wife is not a mistake, it doesnt happen by accident! What a stupid excuse, if he wasnt planning it why did he have comdoms with him? he is a creep, Amor he isnt worth it get your kids and run for the hills. No one deserves what he has done to you.

  • julie - 2009-11-04 10:49

    We are taught that Life is about choices & we need to take responisibilty for the consequences of our actions, however this is not the first time in life that this has happened to the human race, and it won't be the last, so instead of the media making tons of money over this story, who are we to assume and judge, let them be, and pray that forgiveness and love can bring about a happy ending...Life is too short, so live for Now !!!

  • KC - 2009-11-04 10:51

    Joost is launching a new career as a singer..his first major hit will be the song, "For all the girls I've loved before...

  • Angie - 2009-11-04 10:54

    I have to agree with all you about Amor I too have little sympathy...sorry honey you also had an affair with Joost. As for the comments about South African's being high and mighty, thats got nothing to do with this saga, Joost and Amor used the public to become a well known celebrity couple, how many times were they on TV showing off their perfect life! As for Joost well men like him never change their ego's are just too for the book he just wants to make money by sensationalising his own freaking sick!

  • Harry - 2009-11-04 11:04

    Everyone that thinks that this is a joke needs to forgive themselves first...before making any silly remarks. What had happened is sad...bit it could happened to anyone of us. I share his humiliation although he has subjected himself to it...I really do feel it foe his wife and I sincerely hope that they forgive themselves before they forgive each other. All that needs to happen is the "how" and not the "what's next"...

  • LadyP - 2009-11-04 11:06

    Joost is a prick. Charmaine is even worse. I feel empathy for Amor and the children, and Joost's first wife. This too will pass and the best revenge on men like Joost is to get over him as quickly as you can and get on with your own happier life. Forgive him as he is the father of your children but don't let him get the chance to do it to you again.

  • Jacques - 2009-11-04 11:14

    What is Charmaine Weavers trying to accomplish by coming out with this and now only? And what did Amor expect? afterall Joost left his first wife for her - what goes around comes around? She should probably leave him now - it will probably happen again. But who are we to judge? He is human just like us and we all sin, and yes it is wrong but let's stop casting stones and remember Joost as one of the greatest SA rugby players of all time.

  • mark - 2009-11-04 11:21

    Let the one who has never fallen throw the first stone.
    Joost has come clean and asked for forgiveness, showed remorse for his actions
    Who are we to deny him that.
    Joost and Amor, forget the public opinion. Take your problems to the foot of the cross and work together to make your marriage survive. It can work despite public opinion. Put your hands in Gods powerful hand and ask Him to guide and lead you both through this traumatic time in your lives. God Bless You