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15 Jun 2004

Bloody Exes!!!
Morning everyone hope you had a good nights rest...

Geesh!! My life is becoming a true soap apera and I am probably being a bit too dramatic but today I am still emotional. Why is it that I am still scared of my ex? The weekend he wanted his CD back which I dropped at his mom's place. I mean really a bloody CD... I had such a wonderful time chatting to his parents and siblings especially his little sister whom I love to bits and ended up staying there for more than 3 hours. Everyone hugged me when I left and it felt really good, I sent him an sms telling him that his CD is at his parents place so he can collect it anytime... OK, I must admit this whole CD thing I found abit strange and knew that he was up to something AGAIN, and I guess because of the way i felt after the weekend which was totally crap, I wanted to feel a bit special. My suspicions were confirmed when he asked me what I was doing tonight.

I told him that I was free after 21:00 and now I am scared that it might have been the wrong thing to do and my response was based on an emotional need which could be damaging to me and the long run or probably much sooner than that...

Its been almost eight months and quite a few boys later and yet I am still so weak and vulnerable when it comes to him. WHat boggles me the most is that I am used to strong dominering successful men and can handle them quite fine whereas this guy is not even what I would classify as successful or have any of the qualities I claimed was appealing to me.

Why do I find it so difficult to control my emotions when it comes to him. Generally he is not the type of guy I would go for and only made an exception once and now I have to pay for that mistake for the rest of my life? It really feels awfull to think that not even a strong male can me feel as helpless as this guy...

I am afraid that if he asks me to come back this time that I would... To think that I've played it so he can be in this position where he wants me back and now that it is happening by luck or hard work I feel scared again...

Thanks for reading my posting

CA
Answer 430 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Hi Cool Aid,
Sounds like you feel scared that you might give in to the temptation to accept him back, if he asks, even though you know that this would not be a good idea for either of you. And after the pleasant contact with his pleasant family, maybe this has tipped you back towards feeling positive about the possibility of hooking up with him again. But it's him you'd be going out with, not them.
Q's suggestion of a way of analyzing the situation sounds excellent, and well worth trying. But really, if I understand you, you have sincerely tried this relationship before and it did not work out, so it's really unlikely to do so in any second shot at it. Maybe it's best to part amicably, and leave him to collect his own CDs ?
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