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02 Oct 2007

CS
Hi CS
A colleague recently told me that I’m the most irritating person she knows. On someone’s suggestion on the forum yesterday, I asked the colleague what it is about me that people find so irritating and bad. She said she doesn’t know what I’m talking about, and disappeared as quickly as she could. I have difficulty imagining one positive thing about myself. Avoiding people is the only way I can think of peventing them making fun of me and saying bad things about me. The bosses even called me in about my colleagues’ complaints. It is so bad now that I’ve requested a demotion just to try keeping everyone off my back. Maybe that will just give them one more thing to say about me, showing that they were right about me all the time, but I don’t know what else to do. I really can’t trust anyone. I’m too old to get another job. Sometimes I wish I can end my life when the pain bocomes too mucch. I won’t, I’m too much of a coward. I called my shrink and he prescribed something for anxiety. His only comment was that the anxiety is an old complaint. I took a double dose of the tranquilizer last night, just to calm down. My shrink won’t be happy about it, but I was so anxious I couldn’t sit still. I’ve decided to try and block my thoughts about everything. Will it help?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

See a good local shrink as soon as possible, for a proper assessment and advice based on the results of that. You sound depressed and of very low self-esteem, and should be able to feel happier and more confident with proper treatment. This sort of depression can be very dangerous --- and yet it generally responds really well to proper treatment. Have you told your shrink about the depression, the hopelessness, and the thoughts of suicide ? This is much more than anxiety disorder. Maybe a second opinion is needed, if he isn't taking this seriously enough
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