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07 Jun 2004

I agree - Men really are all the same
And my soon to be ex husband is the prime example of that. Just last week was my 29th birthday. He said he was kinda short of cash at that moment and could he borrow my ATM card so he could get me something. Of course it's no problem I mean it's our money even though it is actually mine, but it's the thought that counts right? He went off and bought me a R1000 Puma jacket. But what do you know - Friday I found out that he gave his little girlfriend R3000 towards buying a car, and even told her she doesn't been to repay him! I heard this with my own ears because I was listening in, I also heard about where they had been the previous Sunday when I was trying to call him all day but the cell was conveniently off. So of course the cat is out of the bag, and he is still denying it, which he can do until he is blue in the face I know he's lying. When I called the little tramp to find out just who the hell she is, she told me It's none of your f'ing business who I am and don't you ever f'ing phone me again. Ok - I do not know where that came from, since all I had the chance to say was Hello. I am just really happy that my mother forced me to get an ANC, bless her soul. To think, when I met this man I thought it would be forever, upto Friday, I still thought we had a chance. I love him but I have had it upto here with his lies and sorry ass excuses! I've always been the little girl depending on him and asking his opinion about everything, but now all that is going to change. It's been 3 days and I haven't heard even a sliver of explanation or an apology, infact I am the one being ignored! I think I have given him enough opportunities to come clean but he still wants to make out that I am crazy and in the meantime have his little bit on the side.

That's it! Today I did 3 things for myself that I would usually okay with him first. I joined the AA, bought myself a cool new cellphone and I contacted a divorce lawyer.

Ladies, I'd like to ask you to open your eyes. Believe me when I tell you I never dreamt he would do this to me. Even at this moment I feel like I cannot live without him, but I am going to force myself to, no matter what.

So Never say Never!!!
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Hi SG,
There are no good guys in your story. It was foolish to give him your card --- you can buy yourself a present any time you want to, And if you were listening in on his telephone conversation, then you should remember the old saying that eavesdroppers seldom hear something good about themselves --- and if you trusted him that little, it's amazingly odd to have given him your ATM card ! It sounds like you've been enabling and encouraging him to misbehave.
All men are NOT the same --- and as kernel so perfectly puts it, are you saying that all women are like the little slut he's paying off ? And Buffs, the men are not being over-defensive. When anybody says ALL men are X or Y, that actually means that every single man, including every male reader, is X or Y --- that makes it a personal comment about them, and they're entitled to resent it. In fact, SG has recognized that she over-generalized.
Yes, SG, on your way to becoming a sadder but wiser girl, you had a raw deal with a truly silly man, and it sounds like you'll be well rid of him. talking to the divorce lawyer sounds like an excellent idea.
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