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30 Aug 2007

Love him from a distance
My first day at a new job in 2003 i met a man that i fell in love with. He was married and i was in a long term relationship and so we were just collegues. I have since left that company and only chat to him on the phone every now and then - yet i still have such strong feelings for him. It is this deep caring and love that i feel. I am now engaged to be married in a few weeks and he has since been through a divorce and is in a new relationship. In the past he has said subtle things that have made me wonder if maybe he felt the same way about me. I dont want to interfere in his relationship and i dont want to jeopardise mine - i am very happy and love my fiance wholly - but this man is still in my heart. I have thought that maybe i should email him to just ask him if he had / has feelings for me too and get some closure. I dont know if that is the right thing to do though. Should i just continue to love him from a distance??
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

We've been through just this issue so many times. He's married, so nomatter how he might be thinking of you ( and your thoughts on this are surely coloured by wishful thinking ) you KNOW that you should not aim at a relationship with him, which would hurt innocent other people. Google for info mon the technique of Thought Stopping, and try it. No, don't continue to love him at a distance --- stop loving him altogether and concentrate on your own life and your real, rather than fantasy relationship
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