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08 Mar 2003

Doctor I need help, Last weekend I caught my husband masturbating in the T.V room at 15:00 while the whole family was at home. This is not the first time I've seen him doing this, but has denied the other times when confronted. He never wants sex and I'm lucky to get it every 3 - 6 months because he claims to be under stress.
About 6-7 months ago he got hit on the side of the head just above the ear with a golfball while playing golf. He did go to our GP as he was having mood swings worse than a woman.
Nothing was found wrong, well what am I to do as the whole family is telling him that he is not normal anymore, but he just laughs at it.
How can you sit in the tv room which is an open plan room and masturbate while watching the models on the box. The other time I caught him while watching the music channel, he is so busy that I was in touching distance away and he still did not no I was there. Please this is becoming a problem for me to
deal with and I do have 2 teenage daughters who can walk in on him doing this anytime.
This is a serious matter and not to embarrase him, I cant speak to anyone else about the subject and I need advice and help urgently.
Answer 429 views

01 Jan 0001

Dear Worried,
I can understand your concerns. Masturbation is entirely normal, but an adult chooses the time, place and circumstances far more carefully than you are describing in your husband's examples. These sound like lapses in good judgement, rather than purely sexual activites.
As usual, only a comprehensive assessment in person by an expert shrink could help you both be reasonably sure about what exactly is happening. There is some possibility that the head injury did cause some brain damage, and while many GPs are competent, assessing someone for the more subtle signs of a head injury or its consequences is not something many of them are expert in. There may have been damage to some areas of the brain directly from the accient, or from consequences of it, like a small and slow bleed within the linings of the brain. What would be best, would be for him to see a Neurologist, and providing that specialist with information about these masturbation episodes, as well as the other reasons why others in the family have said he doesn't seem normal any more ; and letting that Neurologist do a full physical exam and careful history, and perhaps perform X-rays, perhaps an EEG ( measurement of brain waves ) and/or a brain scan.
It is possible that nothing will be found to be amiss, but it's be safest to make sure of this.
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