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11 Oct 2006

My gf not over the loss
Hi CyberShrink,

My girlfriend's gran passed away about a year ago. Since then she has not been herself. She seems distant and has trouble enjoying life. She contantly thinks about her and the people close to her's imminent death. This has become worse in the last few months.

She lies and cries in bed at night. She also contantly questions what the purpose of life is if all of what we do is temporary and meaningless. If she becomes ill or feels pain somewhere in her body, she immediately thinks it is something which will cause her to die.

I hear her sigh during the times we are together, and when I ask her she says it is nothing. She does not want to talk to me about the problem.

She asked me whether I think she needs to see someone about her problem. I said that if she is asking that question she probably should, since it seems that all she thinks of is death. She is busy pushing me in the same direction...

What do you suggest we/I do?

Thanks
Jody
Answer 348 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Normal grief takes around 9 months or more to resolve. When for any reason it is complicated, it lasts longer than that. And when it seems unduly lasting and disabling, then seeing an experienced counsellor can be more useful. In her, this grief may also have blended with a deepening Depression, and now with features of hypochondriasis. All the more reason to encourage her to see a good local shrink, preferably a psychologist, for a full assessment and advice on treatment options.
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