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18 Jun 2004

Need Therapy to control anger??
some things truly make me instantly angry and I can actually feel my blood pressure go up - I know I don't need medications because it does not stay up. I've been told to breath, con\unt to 10 whatever but at the time one doesn't think of these things. One example is when I am telling my boyfriend about how I feel about a certain situation "I really feel quilty ...or I feel irritated" he then says "One shouldn't feel....etc.etc. This pees me off because they are my feelings. That's one of the things but as of late even small things at work or with people on the phone make me made........do you think I should have therapy or is it a medical matter. I really want to change but also do not want to be a person who is wishy washy and let people walk over me or minipulate me. Any suggestions?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

goodday Blow Up,
Well, I wouldn't dare trying one of those "One shouldn't feel..." lines, would I ? It's an interesting example thouh --- one's feelings are one's feelings, but that doesn't automatically mean they're all appropriate, correct, and need to be unchallenged and unchanged. I don't think this is a medical matter. As Gino suggests ( among some other fair advice ) sometimes you get excessively angry over small things because you're feeling stressed or annoyed about something else that's harder to indentify or get angry at. A counsellor could indeed help you to understand and modify these unpleasant reactions --- with not risk of becoming a wishy-washy doormat. Maybe it's some form of fear of being seen as wishy-washy, and of being manipulated, that lies behind these outbursts of anger ?
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