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17 Sep 2007

pregnant but not his child
How do i tell my fiancee who is in prison that i am pregnant. i don't have regrets about it since i have always wanted a baby of my own. he is doing quite a long time and by the time he is out i will be thirty four. i am thirty now. How do i break the news to him. we are the so called "the love birds" of that prison, everybody knows us, from his inmates top prison warders. he is a man of dignity and pride surely he will not want people to see me like that while he is in there.please advice. Thank you very much for your help
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Its understandable that you may have thought about having a child while you are still young enough to do it more safely, but if you are truly his fiancee, didn't you owe it to him to discuss this issue with him, rather than going behind his back ? PResumably with his relatively long sentence, there are serious reasons for him being in prison. Yet you decided to continue not merely as his Gf, but as his fiancee. It would have been understandable if you had discussed all this with him and explained that reluctantly you would move on to a different relationship, or if you had decided to remain faithful, but you seem now to be taking the worst of all alternatives.
And I am uneasy about someone who says "i have always wanted a baby of my own", as though its all about what you want or would enjoy, and without taking into account whatever would be best for the baby. See a good local counsellor, perhaps there's even someone attached to the prison / probation serice, to discuss this with
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