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01 Apr 2004

Problems with family about lifestyle
Dear Cyber Shrink, my family is entirely against my lifestyle. They think that because I told them I am bisexual, that there is something "wrong with me" and that I need to go to a therapist. What should I do? :-(
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Dear Spyder Monkee,
You don't mention your age, which is relevant in several ways, including the observation that before one is at least in one's late teens, probably into one's twenties, most people aren't so sure about their sexual orientation. Also, if you are still living with and dependent on your family, they may well feel they have some basis for concerns if your actions ( rather than orientation ) cause some sort of bother within their own home.
If you are mature enough to have recognized realistically what your orientation is, then it's not up to anyone else to interfere with it --- if you are happy with it. It's years since therapists ( except for a few fanatics who ought to be avoided ) felt they had any business considering that there was "something wrong" with people simply because they had one of the sandard variations in sexual orientation, or felt they had any right to interfere with it.
If for some reason you are unhappy with aspects of your sexual orientation or behaviours, then, as with any other form of personal unhappiness, a therapist might be able to help you work out how to be happier within your way of life. You may find that a gay & lesbian organization, if such is within your reach, could provide some peer support and the opportunity to discuss with others who have faced a similar situation, the problems of "coming out" and family support or lack of it.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical examination, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.
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