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01 Jun 2004

Russian Woman
Good Day

I would like to asked a question, but first want to tell you a little of my life. Six years ago I was in a motor accident and my wife passed away in this accident. I was left behind with my 2 children boy (8) daughter (11).
I come from a normal South African life stile with steady parents where divorce ect is not even a subject in discussion. I came from a family with high family values and good moral standards.

I have been in several relationships with other woman who mainly have one daughter as a child. In all these relationships it was for me as if my daughter is pulling on the shortest string.
It is as if these woman’s daughters goes out to show that they will be put first in front of my daughter. There is always this competition between the children were they go out to see who gets put first. And al the time it is fights amongst the children. Partly from that, all the woman’s life’s are in a hectic life style. They have a lot of depth and x husband baggage and problems. Most of the times when I went into a relationship, I need to help them to sort out there problems. Then there are the problems with the children, that in the end I am just getting tired of every thing. Emotionally I am drowned and get with in 5 months at a stage were I just do not see how it can work out. I them break up the relationship and rather stay on my own.
I got to the stage where I do not date woman any more. I do not go into relationships any more. I just have this in my mind that it will never work out. I also have met a lot of woman that is very ambitious.
This type of woman is the more modern type. They are the once that is career orientated and only wants a guy when they feel like, they need love…..

I do want to have someone in my life. I would love to have a good woman that will accept both my children. After all we are all people who wants to be loved and have the one and only in our lives.
A friend of mine was in Europe (Noorwiee) and met a lady friend there. She is a very good person. She is a woman that just want to be a wife for her husband. She have good moral standards and is the most lovable woman I have seen. He is so happy with her and she really loves him a lot.

My friend then said to me that I must think of importing a woman ( with no children) from Russia. I went on the net and saw a lot of agency’s advertising beautiful woman from Russia. They are good woman and still have good family values. My question to you is. What do you think of that??? Will it work out for me when having two people with different cultures? Do you now of some one that have done it, and did it change the person life positively?
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Morning, m-l,
I suppose one's first concern might be the honesty of these online agencies, which obviously exist in order to make themselves money, and whether they are honest and helpful to their clinets ( like you ) and to the women.
And the second issue would be whether, if so, this is a method by which you could meet someone with whom you and your children could be really happy. As Volcano points out, such relationshiops with a foreign woman are not necessarily likely to be happier for the usual interpersonal reasons -- with the added dimension that if things don't work out with a local woman, it's fine to part and let her continue with her existing local life --- but what if things don't work out with an imported woman ? Are you supposed to fly her back to Russia ( or wherever) ?
Language and culture differences can be more of a problem than most people recognize in advance.
There are, surely, also pleasant and unattached or unencumbered local woman with whom you could also be happy ?
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