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Question

04 Nov 2008

Useless ex husband
Hi, I have been divorced a couple of months now, separate 1 year now and in the one year of separation, my ex has seen the kids about 8 times.
I really get angry when he does want to see them as I feel that he hasn' t earned the right, he only sees them when he feels like it and when he has money. Then when he does take them, they come back with loads of presents / sweets. He is buying their love? I never stop the kids going but I find that I become nasty and angry.
Please tell me what I can do to get over what seems to be some serious anger towards to ex, or how to deal with letting the kids go see their dad.
Answer 703 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Release yourself from this bitterness --- it must NEVER be about him "earning the right to see them' --- its supposed to be all about the kids, and their need to see him. Maybe he does try to buy their love --- or maybe he feels bad to try to see them when he hasn't enough money to spoil them, and then does spoil them when he can, out of feeling guilt for the times he neglected them. Keep reminding yourself its about what's best for them --- not to please hi or even you, but the kids
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