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11 Feb 2010

Why does a good woman cheat?
Because you need love and attention. No one can get up go to work come home go to bed day after day, while your husband works 7 days a week. He does work and he is at this business when I go there so he is not cheating.

The more money he makes the more he works. The longer he says open. Even when he' s closed he' ll stay and fix things up just as to not employ someone.

In the meantime i am bored. How much shopping can you do? How much decorating can you do ? How much gardening? He refuses to take 1 day off except christmas. We never go away for an evening. We don' t go away for a weekend. We don' t go away for a holiday. In 5 years of marriage we only went the 1st year.

When we go to functions I always go alone. Or when he does he gets there late when he closes.

We have not friends because I am always alone. who wants to start a braai after 8pm?

I let us once go to a shrink he went 3 times and then refused as the shrink supposidly always took my side. He refuses to work through a book I bought (fireproof) where you work on your relationship for 40 days and do each day what they tell you to.

Lately we don' t even talk anymore its as if I dont exist to him. When he is home he' ll only talk when spoken to and not even always. If I say something (thats how i feel) he does not think justifies an answer he just ignores me.

Faxes to him, emails to him and sms' s to him he just ignores and he will not talk to me.

Is this why his 1st wife cheated on him? I can see why. It' s not in my nature. It' s not who I am. It' s not that I want love from another man. i want love from my husband. I want an evening away WITH HIM.

But eventually i guess i' ll start looking around, because no woman is an island. I see through the keyhole he' s even wanking in the bathroom mornings before showers. He is just so content with his life I mean nothing.

I cannot see myself living a life like this until I die. regardless of how I look or who i am or what I also deserve to be loved. To be held. To feel great.

I even asked him if he' s making a booking for valentines as we always make something out of it - he ignored me. I then faxed him a restaurant that has great special including a night away. He just ignored me. when i talk about it he just ignores me.

Yes, i have my own single girlfiends but there is only so much one can do with them because you dont want to go where singles go and at night I am at home with the kids.

HELP ME PLEASE.

I cant go for counseling because id have to go alone. i cant talk to him because he does not talk to me.
Answer 347 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Some spouses, most often men, feel that their only duty in a mariage is to "provide" financially, ignoring their emotional / pychological responsibilities
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