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20 Sep 2007

Woman ogling
My husband and I have a wonderful relationship bar his ogling of other woman in my presence. He says that he loves only me, but has this bad habit of staring at any attractive woman who walks by. From a previous marriage of infidelity, this makes me feel degraded,inadequate and it hurts. I do understand that men will look at other women, but in my front of me doesn't make me feel great. We have had many discussions regarding this and he says that he does not know why he does it "call it carnal", says that he will conscientiously try not to do it but this never lasts more than a few days, he also says that he doesn't want to hurt me. I feel that this is eventually going to come between us and destroy the love that we have of which I think neither of us would want to happen. Am I being unreasonable in the way I feel or should he go for counselling?
Answer 685 views
Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

THis is NOT what "all men do". Its generally unacceptable and upsetting both for you, and often for the object of his attention. Now, although it's understandably upsetting for you, it's important to recognize that it's actually not about you. WHy not, if he insists that it is not meant to be hurtful and that he wants to stop it, ask him to join you for some proper marriage counselling, to sort this out ? As G says, this is a bad habit, and habits can be unlearned
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