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Question

22 Apr 2004

Screaming and jealousy
Dear Doc,
Please help me. I have two wonderful little girls ( 5 and 20mths) and I am 17 weeks pregnant (planned). The problem I'm having is that my 20 mth is being really impossible at the moment. She seems to be extremely attached to me and refuses to go to anyone else, which I don't really mind, but it's getting out of hand. I even have to take her to the toilet with me.
I took her off the breast when she was 14 mths, and since then she's become quite jealous when her sister even tries to sit next to me. She loves my husband to bits, and will play with him for hours, but as soon as she sees me walk by, she starts crying for me and will not stop until I take her.

Her latest craze is that she refuses to sit in her car seat. Even though she has always used a car seat from birth, with no problems. On this there is no compromise for their own safety. The other day we had to drive to PTA from JHB and she screamed the entire way there. How is this possible? On the trip back though, she cried half way and seemed to realise that she had no other choice.

I've taken her to her paed for a check-up and he says that she is perfectly healthy and bright so I should not worry, but you can imagine my concern. Both children get a lot of love and affection, but the small one is really making me worried. What am I going to do when Her baby brother/sister arrives? This is really frustrating me and makes me feel like a bad mother. Please give me some advice. Thank you.



Answer 364 views
Expert
childhood diseases
paediatrician

01 Jan 0001

I wish I had easy answers. What you describe is normal behaviour and all children are jealous at this age. It is best to be loving but firm and not to give them any second options, eg. regarding the car seat. Your husband and family must give you all the support they can!!
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