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01 Jul 2010

Am I holding myself back
Its weird chatting to a doctor online but here we go. I am a father of two who loves my children to death but sometimes I get so aggressive and afterwards I dont even know why. When I play with my son I play to rough. I am not sure why I get so agressive so quickly. After these agression spells I tend to apologise and hug him and nurture him why ? I have never seriously hurt him but its a type of bullying I dont understand why? Eveyone tells me wat a good father I am and I would love to take the credit for it but I know the feeling when this bully agression thing hits and I dont think it is normal.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Do you have concerns ( which previous generations more commonly had ) about whether a dad ought to be rough and toughen the lad up versus being nurturing and pleasant ?

Not that long back the latter was the norm - it didn't do growing boys any good, and often left them confused, and experiencing difficulties in demonstrating the gentleness that is so much a part of manliness, which doesn't solely consist of being rough and tough.

How did your own father relate to you ? Often, in ways we don't altogether realize, the model of how to be fatherly is one we absorb from what we see and experience.
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