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21 Jan 2013

Bed wetting
My grandson is 4 yrs and 4 months. He slept without a nappy since he was 2 and a half years. Last year his parents got divorced and they have shared custody. One week with the father and one with the mother. December they had them for 3 weeks each. Since he came back from his mother, he is constantly wetting the bed. He told us that his mother and grandmother put him in nappies during his stay there. How do we handle this situation? I feel that it is not good for his mental development to be put back in diapers with his little brother of 2, (who is also only having a diaper during night time) since he was used to get up by himself at night to go to the toilet. What went wrong??? He is a very happy little boy when he is on the farm with his father. From what we heard his mother is constantly having new boyfriends. Can this be the cause or is it the long time he was away from his dad? Your expert opinion will be much appreciated. Thank you.
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Expert
CyberShrink
cybershrink

01 Jan 0001

Presumably they put him in nappies because he was wetting the bed, rather than without obvious reason ? Its quite common for a child who is emotionally upset by something happening in his life, to slip back a stage in their achievement of goals like toilet training. Is there anything apparent that might hav e upset him during this particular stay ? Has someone talked with the mom and grandmom, about what they noticed ?
Maybe there's a new boyfriend and this in some way upset him ; maybe he was missing his dad due to the longer stay. Spoken to gently, what does the boy himself say about how he felt ?
Maria correctly outlines the best way to handle a resumption of bedwetting, rather than the more discouraging replacement of nappies.
As Anon says, routine is very important to kids and changing this, for whatever reason, often upsets them, though fortunately, not usually for long.
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